Do you wash yourself frequently? I do. Every day. In the shower, using a gel manufactured from a load of chemicals and whatnot. It’s a boring, interminable routine I follow out of vanity. I don’t like stinking of my own sweat and poo poos, you see.
My other half chooses this brand of shower gel called Original Source that sells itself on the basis of its being made of real ingredients. You might’ve seen the adverts. Like Innocent Smoothies, they bang on about how many crushed apples or how many pulverized mandarins they’ve managed to slot inside your shower gel tube.
It’s odd; this promotion of foodstuff in what is essentially a detergent. You see adverts for shampoos and conditioners where they talk about caramel and fudge essence. They assume we want to smell of food. I don’t want to smell of food. I want to smell of sexy flowers.
I could handle all this bullshit marketing, but there comes a tipping point in any movement, and Original Source have just provided us with it.
Instead of your shower gel coming in your standard plastic cylindrical type tube, it now comes in a bag with a little spout, as though it were an energy drink. The blurb sells it as if it’s a beverage. It’s mango and macadamia nut flavour, for Christ’s sake. Little kids are going to spot it in their parent’s shopping, unscrew the lid and gulp it down their stupid naïve necks. It’s like promoting semtex by selling the fact it smells of bubblegum.
Furthermore, holding it while your trying to clean your bits is like holding a lubricated blood-bag.
I know I shouldn’t get so angry about the little things in life, but by crikey, I can’t help it. It’s the minor annoyances that start world wars remember. BOYCOTT ORIGINAL SOURCE.