The Friday Question: Top Gear?


Jeremy Clarkson

So, Jeremy Clarkson’s in the news again – his big mouth’s only gone and admitted to driving at 186 miles per hour. Admitted apropos of nothing, I ought to add, which really makes it an idle boast.

In the past he’s referred to cars as ‘gay’, accused people from the Hyundai company of eating dogs, is rabidly anti-American and mocks the Germans. Furthermore, he says he has a ‘disregard for the environment’, wears tight blue jeans and has a silly curly haircut despite being old.

In his defence, he is pro-smoking and once punched Piers Morgan in the face. The latter makes me feel both impressed and envious. You also can’t deny the man has a way with words, whether you agree with him or not.

So, the Friday question is all about the man with the jowls.

Is Clarkson alright? Or is he a twat?

Be nice to hear your thoughts…

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248 Responses to “The Friday Question: Top Gear?”

  1. Mr Chipz Says:

    He’s alright by me.

  2. Mikey Says:

    I think he poured a drink over Piers Morgan rather than hit him in the face (on Concorde). Sorry but having read an article of his in the Sunday Times in 1994 concerning F1, I realised the guy knew nothing at all about the Sport. (references to Johnny Fotheringay Sorbet and rather crass comments).
    He also said in his defence to driving at 186 mph that nobody listens to him anyway. This is the same man who gloated over the fact that sales of the Ford Probe declined rapidly after his disparaging comments on Top Gear. OK he is a good journalist in as much as that he appeals to middle England but he is not an Engineer, nor is he particularly subtle. Overgrown schoolboy.

  3. Swineshead Says:

    Mikey, I think you’re spot on. He’s a schoolboy. A schoolboy’s naivety (or faux naivety) can be endearing, but simultaneously crass. He’s a contradiction really – being erudite when making the most idiotic statements.

  4. piqued Says:

    I like him, he doesn’t play by the rules yeah, he walks alone

  5. Swineshead Says:

    Fred West didn’t play by the rules – that doesn’t mean he was a good bloke. Despite his excellent sideburns.

  6. george Says:

    I remember reading a few of his blogs. He went to Milton Keynes once, and got harassed by some kids (obviously, as he’s a TV personality) and used it to go one of those ‘kids today’ rants. He’s no worse then any other Middle England social commentator, and a lot better then peter hitchens/Richard littlejohn types, though he annoys me with his ‘I’m… Jeremy Clarkson and this… is…. A CAR.’ Style of presenting. He’s on Have I got news for you tonight.

  7. piqued Says:

    It’s more like this George

    ‘I’m… Jeremy Clarkson and this… isA CAR’

    SH, don’t speak ill of the dead. It’s bloody rude

  8. Swineshead Says:

    Having said that I think he’s just about bearable, I should point out that Top Gear is a pile of utter shit and no better than any reality television.

    It’s not a factual show when you spend half of it throwing a caravan at the moon or exploding a mini in the jungle because you’ve got an inflated budget. It’s boring.

  9. Swineshead Says:

    Take a look at what this idiot did….


  10. george Says:

    One thing that pisses me off about Top Gear is everybody seems to think they’re well anarchic for having those little excursions when it’s all so blatantly scripted. lolz, Clarkson blowed up a caravan!

  11. Swineshead Says:

    They’re great mates though George! Seriously! There’s no bubbling resentment at Clarkson’s higher salary whatsoever – it doesn’t seep through in the footage at all!

    Explosions are great, but a fat middle-aged wanker watching an explosion and thinking he’s really the tits for making it happen, that’s not quite so good.

  12. Napoleon Says:

    Top Gear’s great. One of the few genuinely entertaining shows on TV. Swineshead’s completely wrong about Top Gear, because he’s a tree-hugging, vegetarian nancy boy.

  13. Swineshead Says:

    I am eating roast boar as I type this:

    Top Gear’s Jackass except they smash cars rather than their own faces. Moderately entertaining, but not worth several series… and as for the car racing bit – the omelette challenge on Saturday Kitchen’s more competitive. And has never featured James Blunt.

  14. george Says:

    Oh God yeah, and the ones where they build a car that can go over water or something and then all have a little banter about each other’s cars, it’s all so bloody awkward, you can tell they’re just going through the motions. Give me scrap heap challenge anyday.

  15. Napoleon Says:

    Miserable shits.

  16. george Says:

    Shut up, you racist.

  17. Napoleon Says:

    Shut up? Who the fuck do you think you’re talking to, George?

  18. george Says:

    Calm down, just a little joke…

  19. Louche Says:

    I rather enjoy Top Gear, and sometimes enjoy what Jeremy Clarkson has to say even if almost every car featured seems to be ‘wow this car is jolly fast, what what?’.

    What I don’t like is how now almost every motoring journalist (including motorbikes) feels the need to ape his style and they do it, LIKE A SHEEP AT A TYPEWRITER.

    See even I can do it badly, do I get a free pair of over-tight jeans and a sports casual jacket?

  20. Swineshead Says:

    That said, George, we’ve both clearly sat through an episode or two so it can’t be all bad.

    If you had to get stuck on a desert island with either James May, Clarkson or the Hammond, which would it be?

  21. george Says:

    There are lots of bits that grate at me, (another is the stig, seriously, wtf) but considering I don’t like cars much and can still enjoy the odd episode they’ve got to be doing something right. I’d probably choose Clarkson, because if he doesn’t mention cars or politics he can be a bit funny. I like him on QI.

  22. Mikey Says:

    Apart from the 1994 article other thing’s which make me wonder about his true credentials are:
    1) Did not know hat a Supercharger was.
    2). Wrote an article about how brilliant touring car racing was as opposed to F1

  23. Napoleon Says:

    I’d get stuck with James May. I’ve always found obsessive dullards quite entertaining. If you got stuck with Clarkson, you’d end up beating him to death.

  24. Mikey Says:

    accidentally submitted comment without finishing…more to come…

  25. Swineshead Says:

    I’d also get stuck with James May as I enjoyed the wine show he did with Oz. Basically it was him and Oz getting pissed in foreign climes. Good good. Him and me could ferment some coconut milk and go fishing.

  26. piqued Says:

    Me too, May for me as well. And I’m forced to agree with NC again, Top Gear is fucking great, novacane for the eyes as far as I’m concerned. Thanks Dave…

    The only one I don’t get on with is Hammond -he annoys me with his perpetual faux shock/surprise, he shrieks like a toddler in bath of bleach and he’s shit at driving

  27. Mikey Says:

    Apart from the 1994 article other thing’s which make me wonder about his true credentials are:

    1) Did not know what a Supercharger was.
    2). Wrote an article about how brilliant touring car racing was as opposed to F1. Then on an episode of TG, he read out that Nissan was withdrawing from competition. He then said that he did not know they were in competition.
    They were in the touring car championship that he had been extolling the virtues of.
    3). Claimed that he stayed up all night listening to Le Mans on the radio when the GT40’s won. (May have done But…)
    4). On one of those “challenges” car broke down. Back up crew was working on it. He was standing around like a lemon (cameras rolling) then he realised that he should make as if to be mechanically knowledgeable and stuck his head under the bonnet and poked about for a second.
    5). Too heavy on the accelerator when driving.
    6). Think he talks about torque to sound knowledgeble rather than having a true understanding.
    7). Does not like Football.

    I have said it before on this website , will say it again. Fifth gear much better.
    1). Tiff Needell has actually driven in a GP.
    2). Plato is a good driver that talks with great enthusiasm and knowledge.
    3). Vicki BH is also a good driver.

    Saw in my local bookshop a book, Top Gear, The Challenges.
    Who would actually buy this book?

    Top Gear was great before it was redesigned in it’s present guise.

  28. Swineshead Says:

    Mikey – you’re clearly a motoring purist who loves his cars. And I agree – that is surely the point of a motoring magazine show. The cars are really not the star any more.

    If he doesn’t like football he’s clearly a dunce.

  29. piqued Says:

    Christ not football, not here please


  30. Swineshead Says:

    Cesc and Ade are staying, that’s enough for me.
    I’ll be supporting France in Euro 2008 – what about you, Piqued?

  31. Napoleon Says:

    Fifth Gear is an awful show. The dregs of Top Gear that managed to get the show cancelled on the BBC’s feeble attempt to do a motoring show on Channel 5 – rubbish. Vicki Butler-Henderson makes my fucking blood boil. Give me Clarkson, Hammond and May charging towards the North Pole any day over that Fifth Gear shower.

  32. Mikey Says:

    The blokey bloke I like is Bill Bryson.

  33. Swineshead Says:

    I don’t think I’ve watched Channel 5 in about 3 years.

  34. piqued Says:

    What’s ‘Euro 2008’, some sort of STD?

    Never seen 5th gear, I hate Tiff’s voice and face, if he’s in it, I’m not

  35. extremelisteningmode Says:

    He’s a twat, but a likeable one. He’s the guy in your company who you are forever rolling your eyes at, but you do like, deep down. What’s with the hair though?

  36. John Q Wagonwheel Says:

    I think he’s alright. He’s certainly no idiot, he just takes the whole ‘playing devil’s advocate’ thing to annoying levels occasionally.

  37. piqued Says:

    I prefer Tiff

    Christ I’m bored

  38. John Q Wagonwheel Says:

    Have a wank.

  39. Mikey Says:

    I am probably/ possibly a little envious as he gets to do fun things all day.

  40. shitbagger Says:

    I (Napoleon) can’t be bothered to keep logging in and out of WordPress.

    This is a rubbish question – that’s what I’ve decided. I preferred the sitcom one.

  41. John Q Wagonwheel Says:

    Where’s the plug for your blog – you know, the bastard one which only I seem to read.

  42. John Q Wagonwheel Says:


  43. Swineshead Says:

    Well I did ask for your input by email and this is the reply I got, an hour or two later:

    Sorry about that [the lack of reply] mate. I’ve only just got up.

    You’re welcome to discuss whatsoever the fuck you want… so come on – let’s have it.

  44. Swineshead Says:

    *puts toys back in pram*

  45. John Q Wagonwheel Says:

    Oh you guys. I’m going for a shit.

  46. george Says:

    I’m supporting Portugal. As I’m English, whatever team I support will fuck up.

    Nah, really, either France or Portugal as I can’t stand to see either Spain or Italy win the thing, especially bloody Italy.

  47. beth Says:

    The man’s a twat.

    Not expanding on it, as I’d have to actually spend time THINKING about him – and then he’s won.

  48. george Says:

    He’s quite podgy in that picture.

  49. piqued Says:

    Yes, but Beth, your thought process is clouded by the fact you have tits and a fanni

  50. shitbagger Says:

    Of course he’s podgy, George. he’s middle-aged.

    Wagonwheel – You’re not the only one reading my entertaining new tattle site. The stats are through the roof thanks to the magic words ‘Rachael’, ‘Weisz’ and ‘labia’. The second biggest search term so far is ‘damaged anus’. I love the internet.

    Swineshead – Up yours!

  51. John Q Wagonwheel Says:

    Is it some sort of technorati tool that you use to check those things?

  52. shitbagger Says:

    No. WordPress has a stats section. Blogger doesn’t.

  53. piqued Says:

    That shit I mentioned into todays blog, it came out sideways. Must have been the size of a cat

  54. John Q Wagonwheel Says:

    Mine are terribly innocent:

    cartoon flamingo 13
    capricorn club goodge street 5
    shiny thought 4
    “capricorn club” goodge 3
    cartoon flamingos 3
    beach party menu 3
    old english apples 2
    cartoon baby flamingo 2
    pool party menu 2
    pictures of cartoon baby cherubs 1
    big hairy balls 1
    really old cheese 1
    cartoon food menu 1
    “cloud room” 1
    old cheddar cheese 1
    اخبارالفنانين 1
    dogs b&w pictures 1
    cartoon flamingo pictures 1
    how to draw a picture of a flamingo 1
    dangly balls 1
    of some description 1
    capricorn club goodge 1
    john q wagonwheel 1
    wagon wheel advert song 1
    how to draw flamingo 1
    english chablis cheese 1
    like taking candy from a baby pics 1

  55. John Q Wagonwheel Says:

    Except for the balls ones, obviously.

  56. shitbagger Says:

    “That shit I mentioned into todays blog, it came out sideways. Must have been the size of a cat”

    A solid stool of those proportions is but a distant dream to the digestively-challenged, Piqued. You’re a lucky man.

  57. Swineshead Says:

    We get people searching for ‘Watch With Mothers’, which is TERRIBLY flattering.

  58. shitbagger Says:

    My favourite was, ‘that twat BPPerry’. I get a lot of hatred coming my way courtesy of Classic Rock.

  59. piqued Says:

    It was a very painful delivery NC, frankly I’d have gladly opted for the flaming Bovril that follows a night on the cooking sherry

  60. shitbagger Says:

    It sounds like a successful birth. The congratulations card is in the post. Have you thought of a name?

  61. piqued Says:

    That last comment brought a tear to my eye

    Yes, Tigger

  62. Clarry Says:

    Even though I am a woman, a vegetarian and anti fox hunting I really like Jezza. I like the fact that he speaks his mind in this pc crazed world, even if I don’t agree with a lot of what he says. I used to dislike him, but after reading a couple of his books I think that much of what he says is for effect and/or a joke. If you don’t take what he says so literally, he is much less grating.

    In response to Mikey’s comments, I have a few things to say:

    a) I don’t think that he claims to be all that knowledgeable about cars, more an interested party. Most presenters don’t have in depth knowledge of the subject matter of the programme they are hosting, they are generally chosen for their wit, charisma and ability to present – something that Clarkson has masses of.

    b) A lot of people who watch Top Gear watch the show to see them prat about not to see the cars.

    c) If you could make a fucking good living dicking about on telly, wouldn’t you? If you find their big budget adventures offensive, you’ve got to blame the BBC for giving it to them and the viewers for lapping it up and encouraging them. They wouldn’t do it if there wasn’t a market for it…..

    d) ‘He also said in his defence to driving at 186 mph that nobody listens to him anyway. This is the same man who gloated over the fact that sales of the Ford Probe declined rapidly after his disparaging comments on Top Gear.’ Mikey, if every thing you ever said or did was documented i’m quite sure that you would contradict yourself at some point.

    e) Fifth Gear is diabolical, although Vicky Butler Henderson made some valid points on ‘You’re Fired’ the other night.

  63. shitbagger Says:

    I went fox-hunting before it was banned. A great day out, that was. Me and a bunch of Hooray Henrys tearing up the countryside on horses, galloping after a pack of mentally-challenged hounds. The dogs didn’t kill anything, which was a shame. They should bring it back, that’s what I reckon.

    Piqued – That’s a beautiful name. I created a pool of slurry in the toilet today that I’ve decided to name ‘Marroobarooba’, after my mother.

  64. Clarry Says:

    I find the whole thing completely odious, but it’s the ghouls who chase them, clogging up the roads with their 4x4s I object to most. At least grow some balls and do it if you’re a fan of it…

  65. piqued Says:

    *openly cries*

    *isn’t quite sure if it’s emotion or the 2 inch profusely bleeding tear from the nipsy*

    *calls Claire Raynor/ambulance*

  66. shitbagger Says:

    Why’s it odious? If you’re going to kill vermin, you may as well have a bit of fun while you’re doing it. Bloody tree-huggers. Up yours! No offence, like.

    Piqued – The tear will heal. The stool you’ve produced will be a joy for the rest of your life …

    *pops off to Mothercare*

  67. Jamie Says:

    He’s mostly a twat. Can be funny occasionally, but a lot of his views are abhorrent.

    Pro Smoking? Piss off back to the dark ages.

  68. Mikey Says:

    Hi Clarry, Yes I contradict myself on a daily basis and am an overgrown schoolboy too.

    Yes I would like to “make a fucking good living dicking about”, but not on TV. I don’t “find their big budget adventures offensive”, it was not me who said this though I did mention the book. (I think they are a bit silly though).

    He makes people laugh and that’s OK. He’s usually OK on HIGNFY.

    BUT he doesn’t like Football!!!

  69. piqued Says:

    Can you get me a dozen boxes of Tena Lady when you’re there please.

    …and a shovel

  70. Mikey Says:

    Also I bet if you had a 3- a- side football match in the park, first up to ten, with TG presenters V Fifth Gear, Fifth gear would win easily….

  71. Swineshead Says:

    Jamie – there’s nowt wrong with being pro-smoking. It is legal after all.

  72. shitbagger Says:

    Swineshead – Don’t forget that smoking is now the Great Satan. Evil in a little white stick. And you people stink now! Notice that? In my day, smokers used to smell nice (‘specially pipe smokers), but now they STINK. I think they started to stink about ten years ago when the anti-smoking Nazis showed up and started complaining about a smell that hardly anybody had complained about for five hundred years. So the wheel turns in this bullying, puritan little island of ours.

  73. Mikey Says:

    I always liked the wafting smoke of French cigs. Gitanes, Gauloises, Disque Bleu.

  74. Mikey Says:

    English cigs do smell a bit foul especially those really cheapy ones.

  75. shitbagger Says:

    Do they? Weird that. When I was a boy, I was surrounded by English fag smoke, and it smelled fine to me. Must be a new-fangled thing.

  76. piqued Says:

    I’d hardly describe pro-smoking views as ‘abhorrent’ Jamie

    Read the news much you tit

  77. Mikey Says:

    NC – what you mean filters?
    You probably brought up with smell of untipped Woodbines, Craven A, Players NavyCut…..

    I do think it is going a bit far to take out the cig smoking in old films.

  78. shitbagger Says:

    I don’t think the vast sums of revenue fags bring into the Exchequer (which far outweighs the amount the NHS has to spend looking after smokers if they come a cropper, by the way) is seen as ‘abhorrent’, Piqued. That bit appears to be acceptable. It’s the rest of a smoker’s habit that pompous non-smoking arseholes have a problem with.

    It’s that sanctimonious smugness the rabid non-smokers have decided to adopt since the ban that really gets my goat. Smirking at people having to stand outside in the pouring fucking rain, and wafting their hands about when someone DARES to light up in a beer garden. The fucking cunts.

    You’ve already got your way by ruining the atmosphere in every single pub in Britain, you’ve managed to close down locals at a rate of 68 a month, and you’ve destroyed the clubs, bingo halls and other outlets that got old people out of the house (instead of staying in on their own, then dying), so at least leave people alone to smoke a fag outside, you bastard Nazis.

  79. Jamie Says:

    At no point did I refer to his Pro-Smoking stance as abhorrent.

    I’ve never liked the smell of smoke….now WEED on the other hand….

  80. Swineshead Says:

    Shitbagger / NC… Couldn’t have put it better myself.

    Plus it’s payday so I splashed out on some Benson Silver rather than Amber Leaf.

  81. piqued Says:

    What’s got into you NC, I’m agreeing so vehemently that one of my testis has caught fire

    *lights tab from burning nut*

    *blows it in Jamie’s livid face*

  82. shitbagger Says:

    Amber Leaf’s got a nice smell to it when it’s fired up. I used to like the smell of that stuff your dad smoked. Was it Clan? Pipe smokers always smelled the best.

  83. Jamie Says:

    I dunno, I guess I don’t get the reasons for smoking. As a musician, I know tonnes of smokers. 98% of them (yes 98% EXACTLY) are constantly complaining about how they want to quit.

    I think having a harmful habit like that ‘just to look cool’ is a bit juvenile nowadays, no? I don’t see why anyone NEEDS to do it.

    Now if you were a detective in 1930’s New York, then fair enough. You couldn’t NOT smoke then, you’d look silly.

  84. shitbagger Says:

    “What’s got into you NC, I’m agreeing so vehemently that one of my testis has caught fire”

    I went for a pint last night and it was pissing it down. I was sat inside an empty pub watching about thirty poor sods huddling around those bloody useless heaters. It topped up my seething anger over this ban. I’d have an infinite quantity of punishment smoke pumped into my face if it meant the smokers could come back inside boozers where they belong. I can’t believe that empty non-smoking bit that used to be at the back of a pub is now the entire pub. A shame.

  85. Jamie Says:

    I guess it varies with the types of pub where you live. Being from the namby-pamby south a lot of pubs are happier for it down here and unquestionably have more people in their pubs now than before the band.

  86. Jamie Says:


  87. John Q Wagonwheel Says:

    I’d just shoot them there foxes. It’s more fun because there’s all bangs.

  88. shitbagger Says:

    I didn’t used to smoke because I thought I looked cool, Jamie. I smoked because I was addicted to nicotine. I gave up primarily because I didn’t want to get soaked and frozen to the bone when I went out for a drink in an inhospitable, Northern European country. The reason the British came up with the pub was so we could all enjoy a night out together in the warm. Now I’m sat on my own with all my friends shivering outside. Ruined, that’s what’s happened to boozers. A tradition stretching back centuries that was smashed by il thought-out claptrap from Westminster.

  89. piqued Says:

    Boris Johnson, that lumbering half breed, who, as of the 1st June is stopping me from enjoying a quiet botttle of The Claymore between Stockwell and Kennington, said in his manifesto he was going to over turn the smoking ban in this fair capital of ours…

    If he does I’ll personally put my lips over NC’s cockmeat and suck all the curdled meringue out of his quivering bag

  90. Jamie Says:

    But I would argue that smoking is declining….

    why not join us in the warm, clean air?

    Why did you START smoking? You’re not addicted from day one. I never started because I thought it was stupid and pointless.

  91. Clarry Says:

    Note how smoking ISN’T banned from the Houses of Parliament lounge bar.

  92. Jamie Says:

    Boris Johnson supports you.

    I rest my case.

  93. Swineshead Says:

    I live in the South and i don’t go to the pub very often any more. So what’s happened is, people like me (who are brilliant in pubs, by the way, and don’t talk about mortgages and other rubbish) have been forced out and replaced by bastards.

  94. Jamie Says:

    How do you mean, you are ‘brilliant in pubs’?

    Forced out? I don’t understand.

  95. John Q Wagonwheel Says:

    I used nicotine gum to improve my long-term memory while revising for an exam once. IT’S NOT CHEATING (but tests show that it bloody works, mind). I seem to be totally unable to get addicted to stuff, so it was fine, despite having the equivalent nicotine intake of a 60-a-day chappie for 3 weeks.

  96. Jamie Says:

    So is nicotine just addictive to some people?

  97. shitbagger Says:

    “I guess it varies with the types of pub where you live. Being from the namby-pamby south a lot of pubs are happier for it down here and unquestionably have more people in their pubs now than before the band.”

    Unquestionably? That doesn’t bear close scrutiny. Wet sales pubs are struggling to survive all over the country. Businesses north and south are closing down a rate that’s never been witnessed in this country before. It’s fine if you’re a food business in a decent locale with well-off customers, but a wet sales pub that catered mainly for the ‘sat round the bar smoking tabs’ clientelle has been fucked by this ban.

    There’s something so shitty and nasty about making an old buffer go outside for a tab in the pub he’s drank in man and boy for fifty years. And then he comes back one week to find it’s been bulldozed and the site earmarked for yet more ‘executive appartments’. Exclusive society? We used to be.

  98. piqued Says:

    There’s no case to rest, it was a cheap shot for cheap votes. The fat blonde cunt is a liar. The only thing he supports is that concret cranium on his round shoulders

  99. piqued Says:

    Is it wrong to love a man NC, is it?

  100. John Q Wagonwheel Says:

    there is a physical dependency that can be developed. I must just be a lucky sucka.

  101. Jamie Says:

    Ermm…..what about all the people who wouldn’t go to pubs due precisely to the fact they well full of smoke? I know a number of people who now enjoy going to pubs and didn’t previously.

    I think you’re being a bit overblown with your statements re: closing down at a rate never seen before, struggling to survive all over the country. If you could link to some cold, hard stats I would accept this viewpoint more.

    There’s something shitty and nasty about families not being able to go into what is meant to be a social environment without having their lungs filled with smoke.

    Call me crazy but it seemed a bit of an unbalance that someone who wanted to breathe smoke free air had less rights than someone who wanted to breathe ‘smoked’ air? No?

  102. Swineshead Says:

    Jamie – what’re your band called? Out of genuine interest…

    On the smoking thing, by ‘forced out’ I mean I choose to smoke as I have every right to do, yet I’m now a second class citizen who is forced to go outside. It’s simple.

    And the pub is filled with questionable people.

    I’ve had this argument here, ages ago:

  103. Clarry Says:

    I smoked roll-ups for years, and lots of ’em. However, I gave up smoking 2 years ago, after sitting in the chemo ward week after week with my ailing grandfather who has lung cancer. I was guilted out of it, but do not feel the need to lecture others who continue to smoke, it is their choice and long may it continue if that’s what people enjoy. I agree wholeheartedly with Shitbagger/NC that pubs have been completely ruined. One of the pubs near my house is non-smoking (even before the ban) and plays no music. What is the point of this pub, where’s the atmosphere? Next they will ban smiling, talking and having fun.

  104. shitbagger Says:

    Smoking may be declining (it isn’t, by the way – like Scotland and Ireland, it’s increased since the ban), Jamie. Whatever the facts, it doesn’t give people the right to turn into attack-dogs and bullies against the six million people still doing it.

    And the air’s not clean. Now the expensive filtration systems are being switched off and not replaced, a lot of pubs that haven’t undergone a post-ban refurbishment stink of stale beer, the gents’ toilets, and other people’s body odour. Smoke used to do a bloody good job of masking that. And, fuck, have you smelled nightclubs?

    Why did I start smoking? Because I wanted to. It looked enjoyable. And it was! I’ll defy anyone to come up with a better companion to booze, and only a smoker knows the sheer pleasure of lighting up after a hearty meal or a good session on the bedsprings. Non-smokers don’t know what they’re missing out on.

  105. John Q Wagonwheel Says:

    There have always been ‘family’-esque pubs with less smokiness. I don’t mind smoke, personally, despite never having smoked. It covers up the smell of sweat and stale beer and adds a touch of hazy class. And as I don’t live in a pub I’m not too worried about cancer.

  106. Jamie Says:

    Last Days Of Lorca – (Interpol, Mars Volta, Radiohead, that kinda thing).

    To be honest, at the end of the day I’m on the fence regarding smoking, but I could never really see more pros than cons to lighting up.

  107. Jamie Says:

    All 3 other members of the band smoke.

  108. shitbagger Says:

    “Ermm…..what about all the people who wouldn’t go to pubs due precisely to the fact they well full of smoke? I know a number of people who now enjoy going to pubs and didn’t previously.”

    So where are they then? How come pub after pub is fucking empty? Non-smokers didn’t go into pubs before the ban (remember the empty non-smoking area?), and they haven’t suddenly changed their way since July 1st 2007. It’s bullshit to suppose non-smokers have flocked to pubs now they don’t have to put up with smoke – the evidence is staring you in the face with the hundreds and hundreds of closures we’ve witnessed. Open your bloody eyes.

  109. Jamie Says:

    Ah shit it. I don’t even care. I have nothing against smoking. I think I might be one of those annoying people who just opposes people for the sake of it.

    I think I always like to look at both sides of the argument. Ah well. Sorry to waste your time.

  110. Jamie Says:

    Like I said, link to stats. I live in/near Brighton and all the pubs are absolutely thriving.

  111. shitbagger Says:

    And since when was a pub a family activity. Fuck families. There’s plenty of family things they can do without encroaching on an environment that should be the domain of grown-ups. I and a lot of other people don’t want every aspect of my leisure activities also open to children.

  112. Jamie Says:

    I’ve not seen a single closure since July 2007.

  113. Jamie Says:

    ‘Fuck families’ – Priceless.

  114. shitbagger Says:

    I’m livid now. Livid.

  115. Jamie Says:

    Go to a strip club, or a fascist rally if you want somewhere without kids.

  116. Jamie Says:

    I can only go on my area Mr. Bagger. And seriously, there are NO pubs closing around here. Go down Brighton on any weeknight, the pubs are chocka.

  117. piqued Says:

    There are plenty of places for families to hang out. When I was kid children weren’t allowed in pubs, it’s a place for adults not infants.

  118. Jamie Says:

    Times change. What is it you want to do in a pub that couldn’t be witnessed by kids? Sure I don’t want it to become like McDonalds, but I don’t really see the issue if I’m honest.

  119. Swineshead Says:

    Jamie – I’ll check your band out on my supercomputer at home tonight while smoking a fag.

    The pub closure thing is a cast iron fact. Not necessarily directly attributable to smoking – but it doesn’t help.

    As for pubs being a family friendly place… what a weird concept. Kids sit next to Dad while he gets himself pissed. Does he drive them all home? Pubs are for adults. They’re sanctuary.

  120. John Q Wagonwheel Says:

    you do get local pubs in the countryside around me where it serves as the only sort of restaurant in the area, so it’s fine for families to eat. But I was going to point that out – the primary purpose of a pub (in business terms) is to sell alcohol. They’re not FOR kids really. I just didn’t want to be branded as an elitist or cock for saying so. But now Napoleon’s said it I can, because we all know he’s the bigger arse.

  121. Clarry Says:

    Jamie – Three things.

    1) Pubs are for adults, not families or children.

    2) Smokers who used to smoke in the pub away from their family/children are killing them in the comfort of their own home.

    3) Why does it have to be all one way or the other? Why can’t you have some smoking pubs for the smokers and some non-smoking pubs for those who don’t want to sit in the smoke produced by others.

  122. shitbagger Says:

    “I’ve not seen a single closure since July 2007.”

    In my old home town of Lincoln, six have gone in the last three months. All wet sales, all closed due to the smoking ban. The last one to go has seen a mother and six kids kicked into the streets. Nice.

    “Go to a strip club, or a fascist rally if you want somewhere without kids.”

    No, I should be able to go to a pub. The idea of children in pubs is a new one, Jamie. I don’t agree with it. I don’t want children in the same environment I’m in swearing and drinking. They have lots of other things they can do, one of which shouldn’t be sitting having a meal with their parents surrounded by drunks.

  123. Swineshead Says:

    Sorry Jamie – kids in an environment where there are drunk (and by that definition, dangerous) people… you condone that?

    Then you’re silly.

  124. Mikey Says:

    The Spanish way is good. Basically, rule is that it is illegal to smoke in public establishments UNLESS the establishment allows it, though they should designate a no smoking area.
    Result is all bars have a “se permite fumar aqui” sign and a table (usually by the loos) designated as the no smoking area.

    Cerveza por favor….

  125. Mikey Says:

    That way yous make your choices!

  126. John Q Wagonwheel Says:

    You mean like we used to?

  127. Jamie Says:

    Like I said, I don’t know if these are even my views. Haha. I’m not really anti-smoking, I just feel like I’m being pushed that way by the vitriol directed at all non-smokers nowadays.

  128. shitbagger Says:

    “Why does it have to be all one way or the other? Why can’t you have some smoking pubs for the smokers and some non-smoking pubs for those who don’t want to sit in the smoke produced by others.”

    We had that, Clarry. It worked very well. A perfectly acceptable compromise would have been enclosed smoke rooms, but no.

  129. Swineshead Says:

    But – hey – thanks Jamie for getting everyone going on an uneventful Friday afternoon where all we had for entertainment was Piqued telling us about the poo he did last night.

  130. piqued Says:

    Christ Jamie, The Mars Volta/Sparta should be calling for a policeman

  131. John Q Wagonwheel Says:

    Thom Yorke’s lawyer been on the phone?

  132. piqued Says:

    It was a poo at lunchtime to be fair SH -I think it may have died

  133. Clarry Says:

    By the time I wrote that and it came up about 7 other people had said the same thing. Sorry for the repetition.

    Jamie – Why don’t you link to some stats for your facts? If not we won’t listen to you either. Also your opinions are very pro no smoking for a person who is sitting on the fence with no real opinion on smoking.

  134. shitbagger Says:

    “… the vitriol directed at all non-smokers nowadays.”

    Have I fallen down a fucking rabbit hole, or something? You seriously think the shit’s coming your way? YOU’RE the one INSIDE the fucking pub!

  135. Jamie Says:

    piqued – Haha. Not Sparta. Volta a bit. More At The Drive-In I’d say.

    Swineshead – Poo was the main topic? I missed out.

    ALso when you get home, listen to Big Green Parcel Machine on there. Best song I reckon, they are old though. New soon.

  136. piqued Says:

    Nope, not ATDI remotely, they were much, much heavier (and much better than Volta/Sparta too)

  137. John Q Wagonwheel Says:

    You get some nice gigs though.

  138. Jamie Says:

    So we sound like Thom Yorke, and Mars Volta, and Sparta? Thats about right then, a mix of influences. Like any band.

    And like I said, I feel like I’m being pushed into Pro No Smoking, there’s a bit of a ‘if you’re not one of us, you’re against us’ attitude to Smokers sometimes.

  139. Swineshead Says:

    Now now, let’s not be mean about Jamie’s music, eh?

    At least Jamie’s saying he’s not sure of his viewpoint.

  140. John Q Wagonwheel Says:

    I get on fine with both lots. But then I’m good at that.

    *grins smugly*

  141. Jamie Says:

    piqued – The new stuff, that isn’t online yet, is quite a bit more heavy and driving, some of it would fit stylistically onto Relationship Of C. Described at our last gig as an Indie ATDI.

  142. Jamie Says:

    I can handle the music criticism, that’s absolutely fine by me.

    Tell me more about this poo.

  143. John Q Wagonwheel Says:

    Well if it’s anything, I enjoyed your songs (though I hope the new stuff has more of YOUR sound).

  144. Jamie Says:

    Actually screw it, listen to Let’s Build Ships. Doesn’t sound very like anyone you listed, and the chorus is a fucking stomper. I can say that because I wasn’t in the band when it was written, or recorded.

  145. John Q Wagonwheel Says:

    I am back to my Sly & The Family Stone marathon now though.

  146. Jamie Says:

    Oh ok. It won’t fit in with that. Thats a helluva mood switch.

  147. piqued Says:

    Not being mean, just disagreeing with him

    His band are tight I’ll grant him that, the singer can sing, backing is competent etc -it’s just way too similar to the aforementioned bands

    Go in your own direction and you may have something

    (it was a good 14 pounds of screaming gutmud, Jamie)

  148. Clarry Says:

    Come on Jamie give me your views on why we can’t have either pubs with separate smoking and non-smoking rooms or entirely separate smoking and non smoking pubs? Why does it have to be completely banned just because it doesn’t suit some people? TELL ME!

  149. piqued Says:

    (Mars Volta and Sparta are all ex ATDI members, hardly a wide range of influences. JQW was totally wrong, he’s deaf, thick and wet behind the ears)

  150. Jamie Says:

    I dunno. I don’t agree with segregation really. Honestly, I don’t know what the solution is. I’m not going to be self-righteous.

    But piqued, surely there’s nothing wrong with being similar to a NUMBER of bands? EVERY band is similar to a NUMBER of bands. Even the most unique bands (Sigur Ros) sound a lot like a lot of other bands.

  151. Swineshead Says:

    Piqued’s opinion on making music is worth listening to as he can play half a jesus and mary chain tune on his broken bass.

  152. Jamie Says:

    Sparta was definitely more punk/hardcore, Mars Volta have gone so far away they sound nothing like At The Drive In now. And Thom Yorke was mentioned.

  153. piqued Says:

    read last post Jamie

  154. Jamie Says:

    Oh ok. I’ll take piqued’s musical comments seriously from now on then.

  155. John Q Wagonwheel Says:

    Sigur Ros are a pile of toss. And you can’t deny the Yorkeish sound in the vocals.

    *wipes afterbirth from lugholes*

  156. Mikey Says:

    The solution is let the pubs make up their own mind. Some pubs will be smoking others non smoking. What’s wrong with that?

  157. John Q Wagonwheel Says:


  158. Jamie Says:

    I’d say Last Days also sound like 65 days of static, Godspeed! You Black Emperor, A Silver Mt. Zion, and a few more. Just mentioning famous bands we sound like is pigeon-holing a bit.

    I’ll admit that Post-Rock can be a bit samey, and it is the little differences that set the bands in this genre apart.

  159. Clarry Says:

    Jamie – That’s not segregation, that’s called choice. That way, a smoking person could go into the non-smoking bit if he wanted and vice versa. It’s that simple. The smoking ban is completely discriminatory.

  160. shitbagger Says:

    Half a Jesus ‘n’ Mary Chain tune, eh? I can play ‘Here I Go Again’ by Whitesnake on three different musical instruments.

  161. Swineshead Says:

    Sigur Ros are good. JQW – you’re only 12, your musical opinion frankly means fuck all till you’ve growed up a little bit.

    Weren’t we talking about smoking a bit ago?

  162. Jamie Says:

    I wasn’t disputing whether Sigur Ros were good or not. I for one like them but that’s not relevant to the discussion.

    Like I said, listen to the aforementioned bands and you’ll realise that Thom Yorke is one of many vocalists who sound like ‘that’. I’ll grant you there is some THom Yorke in there, sure. I can only take that as a compliment though.

  163. Jamie Says:

    Sorry Clarry, I thought you meant spearate pubs for smoking and non-smoking, which I think would be taking it all a bit far.

    But due to the nature of a pub, you can’t have smoking and non-smoking bits, cos self-righteous people on either side will always get uppity about it. I don’t know the solution, I’m not going to pretend to.

  164. John Q Wagonwheel Says:

    Oh come on, Sigur Ros are on a par with hooked-on classics. It’s just a load of predictable string lines with wishy-washy vocals on top and the odd extra instrument. It’s GCSE stuff. ANEWAY I GOTZ MORE MUSIC SKILLZ DAN YOO.

  165. John Q Wagonwheel Says:

    Sure, they’re entertaining and make great nature-programme backing music, but they’re not exactly GOOD.

  166. Swineshead Says:

    I rather like Sigur Ros, JQW. What contemporary guitar bands float your boat?

  167. piqued Says:

    I will agree with Jamie (this once) whilst you can copy a bands output it’s not anyone’s fault if in full flight they sound like someone else. For example, when I talk I resemble Penelope Keith but I’m a 7 foot tall Nigerian with a cock as thick as Mike Tyson’s arm

  168. piqued Says:

    (I meant when the vocals are in full flight or my previous mail means no sense)

  169. John Q Wagonwheel Says:

    Rather depends on what counts as contemporary. I do like Radiohead and the Manics, Television, the odd bit of Pavement is entertaining, Smashing Pumpkins were ok. Them’s all in the last 10 or 15 years.

  170. shitbagger Says:

    “But due to the nature of a pub, you can’t have smoking and non-smoking bits, cos self-righteous people on either side will always get uppity about it. I don’t know the solution, I’m not going to pretend to.”

    Never heard of Smoke Rooms then? It’s the reason a lot of pubs are separated into two halves, Jamie. Partition walls could easily be erected in pubs without two rooms. To accomodate the smokers, you could section off about four fifths of the pub, leaving a fifth for the non-smokers somewhere near the toilets.

  171. Jamie Says:

    Exactly piqued – and condolences.

    JQW – Sigur Ros are a bit more inventive than you give them for. Von’s a very scary album.

    But yes, come on chaps, who does everyone love in this crazy world of music?

  172. John Q Wagonwheel Says:

    Neutral Milk Hotel and Olivia Tremor Control were cool.

  173. Jamie Says:

    shitbagger – I guess you’d need to tell the smoke to stick to it’s side as well? Yeah?…..ah….oh.

    Like I said, self-righteous people (smokers and non smokers) will still get picky about it.

  174. shitbagger Says:

    Sigur Ros (whoever they are) are rubbish compared to Whitesnake. I’ll bet this Ros character hasn’t got a mane of golden hair, and I’ll wager he doesn’t wear tight leather clothes. Again, RUBBISH!

  175. Jamie Says:

    JQW – Guessing you had to quickly search your iPod for the most oblique references you could? Otherwise you would’ve said Keane. Admit it.

  176. John Q Wagonwheel Says:

    I own more Classical stuff though. Sort of born into that one.

  177. Jamie Says:

    I don’t see what relevance Whitesnake has to a discussion about music.

  178. John Q Wagonwheel Says:

    I had a quick look on my hard drive to see what I actually listen to.

  179. Jamie Says:

    You love the Keane. I’ll get you to admit it before day is out.

  180. shitbagger Says:

    “I guess you’d need to tell the smoke to stick to it’s side as well? Yeah?…..ah….oh.”

    In most places that wouldn’t be a problem. There were never any non-smokers in most pubs. I think they were reading bibles or something.

  181. John Q Wagonwheel Says:

    I have Keane’s albums but I think they’re very cheesy and samey.

  182. Jamie Says:

    For the record, for me it’s:

    David Bowie, Interpol, Brian Eno, Depeche Mode, Nine Inch Nails.

  183. John Q Wagonwheel Says:

    I’m one of them freak-kids who’s been playing 3 instruments since he was 4, my parents are musicians. I don’t tolerate much shit music.

  184. shitbagger Says:

    Keane stink. I’ve heard of them. That fucking World Cup song they did … Jesus.

  185. Jamie Says:

    shitbagger there’s no point in me continuing A> Because you’ve won, enjoy it. and B> I don’t really have strong feelings on smoking.

  186. piqued Says:

    Really JQW, you think Keane are cheesy?

    Well there’s one for the fucking NME

  187. Clarry Says:

    Jamie, I did mean separate pubs or rooms, if that’s what it takes to get both people some satisfaction. How can people get uppity about choice?

    I’ll state my point again, but who else finds it deeply irritating that the smoking ban was put in place by MPs who can smoke their hearts out in the comfort of their own Westminster social club, apparently above the law?

    I don’t smoke and this enrages me.

  188. John Q Wagonwheel Says:

    Interpol, they’re quite good. Got their albums. All rather gone downhill since the first though.

    Probably the most popular sort of thing I’ve liked was Weezer – The Blue Album and Pinkerton were my soundtrack for a bit when I was 14. Apart from a few tolerable songs on the Green Album it all went shit after those two.

  189. shitbagger Says:

    That annoys me too, Clarry. And they’re all fat bastards (even the thin ones).

    Jamie – I know I’ve won, thanks. I always win.

    *wins again*

  190. shitbagger Says:

    Wheezer stinks too. You people clearly wouldn’t know decent music if it kicked you up the arse. Kids today, etc.

  191. John Q Wagonwheel Says:

    I’d submit it to them but they’re probably too busy fitting into skinny black cordruoys and thinking up new awards to give to The World’s Most Self-Centred And Awful Band – My Chemical Romance.

  192. Jamie Says:

    sb – Haha double win. What about when you’ve lost? Do you win then? Be a gracious winner. If you want. Or not. Free country.

    JQW – I would generally agree with you, Turn On…was the best album of thiers by some way. Yeah I still think Blue Album is quality ‘pop’.

    Clarry – My views are set to ‘undecided’ so I’m not the best person to debate this with. Sorry.

  193. John Q Wagonwheel Says:

    I was 14, I’d just discovered non-classical music, boobs and was getting through crates of kleenex. Have a heart, you sod.

  194. piqued Says:

    Saw Interpol in October, whisper quiet it was. And shit

    I like Weezer

  195. Jamie Says:

    sb – It was Embrace that did the world cup song. Also tell us about some ‘decent’ music.

  196. Jamie Says:

    piqued – I too saw them in October. Was disappointingly quiet, at Ally Pally. Could easily chat to my mate next to me. And NO BASS. Interpol is ALL ABOUT BASS.

  197. Clarry Says:

    NC – Glad we’re in agreement old chap.

    Jamie – Smoke doesn’t need to respect boundaries if you have smoking and non-smoking rooms/pubs. Having completely separate areas has worked for years and should be brought back. A smoker could still go into a non-smoking bit, he just couldn’t have fag there. Please stop missing the point, I need to go and do some work.

  198. Jamie Says:

    I’m not missing the point, you’re missing the point that I’m not IN this discussion! You may as well talk to my cat, Floyd.

  199. shitbagger Says:

    You’re right, Jamie, it was Embrace. I lose track of these fuckers as they all sound the bloody same to me. A quick scoot around the internet has led me to that ‘Something Only We Know’ song they did. I listened to that, and immediately vomited. So I was right all along – they produce manure for the ears.

    *wins once again*
    *does victory lap*

  200. Clarry Says:


  201. Mikey Says:

    But what abou the bar staff? Should they be subjected to smoke in the workplace?

  202. Jamie Says:

    sb – I am not disagreeing with you on the shitness of Keane. But I’m genuinely interested in knowing who you DO like, heard a lot about who you don’t.

  203. Swineshead Says:

    JQW – some excellent choices. Wasn’t expecting that. Olivia Tremor Control are geniuses – saw them supporting Gorky’s once and they were incredible. Pavement will always be my favourite band.

  204. Jamie Says:

    Mikey, Clarry, Clarry, Mikey. Good, there. You two talk about smoking.

  205. Jamie Says:

    Pavement are quality.

  206. Clarry Says:

    You’d think they’d consider that before applying for a job there, wouldn’t you?

  207. John Q Wagonwheel Says:

    Napoleon likes music that makes his ears fall off in jets of blood.

  208. John Q Wagonwheel Says:

    I don’t actually know that, but it should provoke a reaction.

  209. Swineshead Says:

    Clarry – to be fair, I think the smoking ban conversation has run its course. You could chip in with some music chat if you fancy – I know you have a penchant for Ozric Tentacles.

    *plays flute and smokes mushroom bong*

  210. shitbagger Says:

    Huzzah! I’m looking forward to getting drunk this evening. Oh yes. I’ve got a bottle of Wild Turkey in, and a lineup of possibly racist Southern Rock records to take for a spin on the turntable. The Allman Brothers plus too much booze is a cracking combination, as is trying to drunkenly phone a friend to the sounds of The Marshall Tucker Band.

    And who can’t resist vomiting to Down On The Corner at four in the morning? Yeeha, etc.

  211. Mikey Says:

    Yes but what if they are non smokers in a small country village that only has smoking pubs? They would say that they cannot work at the smoking pub…

  212. John Q Wagonwheel Says:

    Thanks SH. I know fuck-all other people my age who share my taste though. They’re too busy saying how great Muse are and getting google-eyed on disco-balls.

  213. Mikey Says:

    Not the Allman brothers…JEssica…ahhh!

  214. Jamie Says:

    sb – Disappointing. Worried about getting shot down for liking Coldplay?

  215. Swineshead Says:

    You’re essentially into mid 90s lo fi indie americana, which is always a safe bet.

    Heard Sunset Rubdown? They am the best.

  216. Jamie Says:

    I was assuming sb was joking about Allman Bros. I would rather listen to Bros.

  217. Mikey Says:

    good southern rock…TP & The Heartbreakers…Jason and the Scorchers!

  218. shitbagger Says:

    Jamie – This is my favourite song of all time ever since yesterday afternoon …

  219. piqued Says:

    Jamie, did you hear me yell ‘turn it up you cunts!’ The lead singer did

    I like pavement, I’ve seen them too

  220. shitbagger Says:

    You think I like Coldplay, Jamie? Ho ho! Right you are, chief. I could get sacked if that was true.

  221. Jamie Says:

    That’s a good song.

  222. Jamie Says:

    sb – I was being tongue-in-cheek. I think I could tell after 5 seconds with you that no, you are a human being, and thus despise Coldplay.

  223. John Q Wagonwheel Says:

    Haven’t heard Sunset Rubdown, but I’ll look them up.

  224. shitbagger Says:

    My hatred for Coldplay goes way above simply despising them, Jamie. Oh the things I would do to those boys with a bag of tools and a sound-proofed room …

  225. piqued Says:

    I hate Coldplay

  226. shitbagger Says:

    I’d love to read on the BBC’s news site that Chris Martin’s been diagnosed with bowel cancer AND cancer of The AIDS.

  227. Swineshead Says:

    Why is everyone stating the obvious?

  228. piqued Says:

    I hate Coldplay SH

  229. John Q Wagonwheel Says:

  230. shitbagger Says:

    Fuck yeah! I’ve just won £100 on a National Lottery scratchcard I’d forgotten I’d bought until ‘er indoors emptied my trousers! Oh fucking yes! Have any of YOU won £100 today?Not likely, I’d wager!

    Read that paragraph back and weep, you scrabbling pack of fucking losers.

  231. John Q Wagonwheel Says:

    Lucky bastard. First the theatre curtain breaks, now you win a hundred quid. You’re in league with Satan, I say. SATAN!

  232. shitbagger Says:

    HA HA! I’m rich! £100! Fuck you, Wagonwheel! FUCK YOU!

  233. John Q Wagonwheel Says:

    It’s gone to your head, I say, all this sudden wealth. Look at you, with your solid gold house. You smug bastard.

  234. shitbagger Says:

    (From his new position swathed in riches ordinary mortals can only dream of)

    In fact, fuck the lot of you! Ho ho!

    *dances in a cloud of fabulous wealth*

  235. John Q Wagonwheel Says:

    Once you’ve blown it all on gold watches, whiskey, whores, whore-flavoured whiskey and gold-plated whore watches you’ll come crawling back, begging for forgiveness like some desperate slattern.

    In the meantime, can I have a tenner?

  236. shitbagger Says:

    No! No you can’t! Ha ha! This money’s being spent wisely on my new lifestyle of boats, Caribbean holidays, the Monaco Grand-Prix, and Omega whore watches. You can whistle if you think I’m spending a bean on you, you underpaid drone!

    £100! FUCK YOU!

  237. John Q Wagonwheel Says:

    Fuck me! 237 comments…

  238. shitbagger Says:

    237 comments? Pah! That doesn’t come close to a £100 win on the scratchies.


  239. george Says:

    *comes to the party late*

    One good thing about the smoking ban at least is that all smokers seem to talk to each other. Before the Soundhaus in Northampton shutdown it was quite a little outside community.

  240. shitbagger Says:

    I don’t care about any of that, George. As you sit there, bent-backed in your office drudging away, I’m here livin’ it up with my £100 scratchcard, tax-free, bonanza win. I can afford to ignore the smoking ban now, you bald drone!


  241. Clarry Says:

    Soz SH, but that topic boils my blood.

    Can’t be arsed with a music discussion right now as so exasperated with all the earlier arguing *ahem* ‘discussions’.

    I like lots of music, but am not as much of a music snob as I used to be. Agree with Pavement, I heart Spiritualized, Stereolab and Brian Jonestown Massacre at the moment but Mozza will always be my number 1. The list of other bands I like is endless. Haven’t listened to the Ozrics for some time now, they were one of my faves alongside The Orb in the olden days.

  242. Napoleon Says:

    Clarry – That’s by the by when you realise I’m in the money and you’re not. Enjoy your weekend as a hopeless pauper!

  243. Trance4you Says:

    More information about Top Gear TV Show (11 Season) there:

  244. Joanne Says:

    I hate to bring this back on topic but I fucking love Top Gear. Jeremy Clarkson is pure entertainment and I don’t give 2 shits about what he does or does not know about touring cars or F1 or any of that boring nonsense.

    As for being stuck on an island, I’d take Hammond. I don’t care if he’s approximately 4’2″ and his hair’s gone a bit Richard Madeley recently, I’d still piece him.

    And to chip in on the smoking debate, I’m a non-smoker and I enjoy not having to breathe cigarette smoke. The smell of which, whilst not as hideous as cigar smoke, is still unpleasant. Why can’t everyone just smoke pipes? Lovely fragrant pipes. And as for being ‘forced’ outside, nobody is forcing you to smoke. Get off your high horse. Also, granted I’ve only been frequenting pubs for about 6/7 years but I’ve never been in one with a designated smoking area. And not one pub within a 2 miles radius of me has closed down and they’re rammed in the evenings.

    Having said that, every single pub now smells like piss.

  245. Napoleon Says:

    Joanne – As a woman, your opinion on Top Gear is neither here nor there. It’s not made for you. Also you’re wrong about Hammond – he’s the rubbish one.

    As for your views on the smoking ban, I’m a non-smoker too (much to my bitter regret). Since the smoking ban I’ve had to sit in pubs with people like you – their arms folded with a conceited look of smugness on their face as others shiver outside in the rain. I’d rather they kicked your lot out, and let the real customers back in.

    And as for all the pubs in a two mile radius of you staying open? What’s that? Four pubs? Where do you live? If it’s in a city centre, then you probably won’t have noticed the closures, no? Try going for a walk and you’ll find plenty of pubs that have shut down. They tend to be wet sales that relied heavily on regulars and smokers. You’ll also find struggling social clubs, working men’s clubs, and bingo halls. Or don’t you give a fuck about what people who are over forty and who don’t want to spend the night in a ‘heaving’ pub do for their entertainment? Probably not, under 25s usually don’t.

    Finally, the smell. Fuck off. If you’d been born in the 70s or earlier, you wouldn’t give a tupenny fuck about ‘the smell’. That only turned up as an issue a few years back when non-smokers had the notion implanted into their brains as something to be artificially offended by. The same goes for breathing it in. Still, who cares? Your lot got your way, and ruined pub atmospheres for the rest of us. Cheers!

  246. Jamie Says:

    Am I the only one curious as to what happened to the £100?

  247. Eddychronic Says:

    i think Napolean is over opionated and should curbe his feelings to be more leftist and liberal like mine. Richard is cute and i am almost sure he cares about ‘the people’. Clarkson only cares about cars and push bycycles and all things petrol.

  248. John Q Wagonwheel Says:

    Yes, let’s be ‘liberal’ and force him to be something….right.

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