NewsGush – Marsh vs Price


According to some guff on the GMTV website, Jodie Marsh – glamour model and ‘TV Personality’ – suffered bullying at school because of her nose.

Jodie Marsh revealed on GMTV this morning she was cruelly called ‘plastic face’ at school after having a nose-job.

Talking on the breakfast TV show about the increase in teenagers having plastic surgery as a result of bullying, the glamour model admitted that after she underwent cosmetic surgery at the age of 15 – she was bullied at school even more.

“I did have a nose job because of the bullying – because they made me feel so embarrassed and ashamed and ugly and hideous about it” said Jodie.

“I don’t think surgery is an answer to bullying, certainly not. Because my bullying then got worse after I had my nose done because then they started calling me ‘plastic face’, or ‘don’t stand in the sun – you’ll melt.’But I felt better, I felt absolutely amazing afterwards.”

What she doesn’t say is that she originally fucked up that very nose by playing Hockey at Brentford School, where she was privately educated.

Anyhoo, she claims to have had plastic surgery on said hooter at 15 after being bullied about and it was following the surgery that the bullying got worse. She was called ‘plastic nose’, heaven forefend! Sounds like her tormenters were as imaginative as the tormented.

In fairness to Marsh she’s always moaned about being bullied, Celebrity Big Brother viewers were privy to a disgraceful and completely unwarranted attack on her by cunts Barrymore and Burns precisely because she was ‘Jodie Marsh’ and the result is the nightmare we witness shoving its bum into the photographer’s lens every time someone releases so much as an eggy guff.

Anyone can see that under that nose and make-up and wotnot is a deeply insecure person who feels the need to put it about a bit in order to be adored. In addition to the growing collection of dreadful tattoos, she’s had her tits done now – something she vowed never to do – and just about any other bit of cosmetic reconstruction on the menu. Why? Because she’s insecure and fame hungry in a way that takes precedence over money.

She can offer the world nothing, yet like Jordan (who seems to have succeeded in achieving vast sums of wealth by manipulating the press and public alike) desperately keeps trying to force herself into the public eye by wearing as little as possible.

Unlike Jordan, though, she’s despised way out of context for what she’s actually done. She’s not invaded Poland has she? Or, more pertinently, she’s not leaked a sex video. She doesn’t wave her clout about in public, she doesn’t pretend to write fucking books about Donkeys, she chooses instead to dress like a trollop and involve herself at the lowest possible echelon of tabloid TV. In this respect she shares that gem-paste tiara with Jordan, except Marsh only exploits herself. She leaves her family, disabled children et al out of it.

In a way we can see Jodie as a feminist, unlike Jordan who seems to have become a fucking role model for little girls -and in my opinion poses much more of a danger to the psyche of the younger generation of females by muddling up sex, pink ponies and wealth. Men and women seem to despise Marsh without prejudice and while the likes of Callum Best stalk the paparazzi, I’m not entirely sure why.

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54 Responses to “NewsGush – Marsh vs Price”

  1. charliemingles Says:

    Poor girl.

    Tell her that I’ll shag her, Swines old boy.

    I hope that such an act of noble altruism will go some way to healing her delicate sensibility.

    Especially if she likes it up the arse.

  2. Swineshead Says:

    So crude.
    I didn’t write this, btw. Piqued did.

  3. Mr.Chipz Says:

    Tell you what though, look at the fucking STATE of it!

  4. Swineshead Says:

    Now come on, lads.

  5. Wenchy Says:

    I genuinely don’t mind Jodie Marsh – more than anything, I feel a bit sorry for her. ‘Tis like Piqued says, after all; essentially, she just wants to feel loved and wanted. Unfortunately, getting your wabs out while wearing dental floss isn’t always the best way.

    The other thing – she had plastic surgery for her nose – which seems fair enough. If I had a ginormous hooter I’d probably do the same. However, she CHOSE to have one that looked like that?! What did the surgeon do, take a fucking wood plane to it? It looks dreadful!

  6. Wenchy Says:

    Oh, and I used to quite like Jordan, but she pisses me off a bit now. She’s actually launched a clothing line recently, for when you go out horse riding – as I very often do. It’s pink. Very pink.

    Fair play to her though, she certainly won’t have any money worries I suppose.

  7. charliemingles Says:

    I believe her snozz is modelled on the child catcher from Chitty chitty bang bang.

  8. Mr.Chipz Says:

    I don’t hate Jordan or Jodie…I just hate us as a nation for actually consuming that shit.

  9. goerge Says:

    I had my ear pinned back in year 9 much for the same reasons. But then again, I am a complete harlot.

  10. Swineshead Says:

    A measured response there, Chipz.
    George – do they use actual pins?

  11. Wenchy Says:

    Nah, it’s more like a staple gun.

  12. Who Says:

    I’ve always wondered that. And only one ear – bloody penny pinching NHS bastardos.

  13. goerge Says:

    SH: Not as such, they cut into the cartilage in your ear and kind of fold the ear into it, then stitch it up. Hurts like a bugger. And, like Jody, I found that people just bullied me more once they realised I had surgery. Kids are so nice.

  14. piqued Says:

    I’m sorry Wenchy but was SH talking to you? No

    He was talking to ‘Goerge’ wasn’t he? Yes

    So shut it, yeah

    *saunters off*

  15. goerge Says:

    Nice article BTW Piqued. Not that I thought you would, but it’s nice you didn’t go for the easy target.

  16. Wenchy Says:


  17. Swineshead Says:

    Don’t cry Wenchy. By the way – weren’t you going to write us an article?
    We’ve gone mad prolific, so if you fancy it get one done. yes?

    Same goes to you, JQW, you little sod. And send it via the email address on this site, not facebook as I barely check my messages there.

    All of you, in fact. WRITE ARTICLES.

    (But not Friday Questions or NewsGushes).

  18. piqued Says:

    *saunters back*

    Yeah, that’s right Wenchy, yeah

    *gets tits enlarged*

    Thank you Goerge.

  19. The Tombstone Says:

    They’re both fucking idiots. I hope they both [idiocy removed]. That’s my mature well thought out take on things anyway.

  20. John Q Wagonwheel Says:

    Blimey, The Tombstone, I think there’s a list for people like you.

  21. John Q Wagonwheel Says:

    I’m loving ‘They Live’, by the way. That is the most fantastically pointless fight scene, right after he gets tipped out of the truck full of incredibly clean rubbish.

    What fight scene has a better starting line than ‘I’m giving you a choice: either you put on these glasses or start eating that trash can.’?

    They also manage to do the whole thing with just one punch sound effect.

  22. Wenchy Says:

    “Don’t cry Wenchy. By the way – weren’t you going to write us an article?
    We’ve gone mad prolific, so if you fancy it get one done. yes?”

    I’ve actually written one, but I had a bit of a panic, thought it was shit, and “filed it away”. I shall have another look at it and see if it was as bad as I thought….so it will hopefully be with you soon.

  23. John Q Wagonwheel Says:

    ‘Life’s a bitch. And she’s back in heat.’

    When will the classic lines stop?

  24. George Says:

    Based on the above lines, I’m hotfooting it to blockbuster tonight. Which wrestler is it?

  25. Swineshead Says:

    Tombstone – you’ve just headed up a new list – congratulations. The Noel Gallagher list for monitored simpletons. You’ll have to put in a lot of effort to get yourself off that there list, I’ll be bound.

  26. Swineshead Says:

    Glad you’re enjoying They Live, JQW. It’s one of my all time favourites – there’s something for everyone.

    Sci Fi, horror, guns, wrestling, tits, sunglasses, government conspiracy, aliens, shanty towns.

    Fucking great.

  27. Dave Says:

    She looks like a cartoon – a sexy one, like the Cadbury’s Caramel bunny.

    I’d love to do something with Jodie and a sheet of tin foil. Robot sex.

  28. Swineshead Says:

    Now you mention it, I quite fancy the Caramel bunny. Soft fronds….

  29. Dave Says:

    She’s a fucking tease and the reason I can’t own a pet .

  30. Swineshead Says:

    Oh – George – it’s Rowdy Roddy Piper (and he’s all out of bubblegum).

  31. indy Says:

    “In a way we can see Jodie as a feminist”

    in a way we can see hitler as a jew, if “in a way” means that he loved to have jews killed.

    no. i can’t see how “only exploits herself” can be feminist in a jodie marsh way.

  32. Dave Says:

    Jodie is a feminist.

  33. charliemingles Says:

    Im having that made into tshirts right now dave.

  34. Dave Says:

    She covered her tits in chainmail.

  35. indy Says:

    probably in the bloody-3rd-wave-feminism-independent-woman-using-her-t&a-to-get-what-she-wants-while-winding-up-men-whilst-destroying-for-every-female-trying-to-get-some-bloody-respect kind of way. hoorah.

  36. George Says:

    Rowdy bloody roddy piper! Ace.

  37. Swineshead Says:

    Those women trying-to-get-some-bloody-respect should surely try the T&A thing?



  38. charliemingles Says:

    Indy – im afraid that last slogan is too long to fit on anyone but fern brittens tshirt.

  39. indy Says:

    charliemingles: guess we could always have it written over j marsh’s chest.

  40. Dave Says:

    The Mirror said that Gary Glitter should get tagged. I don’t think he should be anywhere near a game of hide and seek.

    I thank you.

  41. Dave Says:

    Sorry. I meant tick. Damn.

  42. charliemingles Says:

    even jodies norks are too small for that. even if they do look like two big fish flapping about in wet plastic bags.

  43. indy Says:

    dave: very jimmy carr.

  44. Dave Says:

    CM- Ben Fogle could make a two-part documentary about traversing Marsh. What are you talking about?

  45. charliemingles Says:

    still worked though dave.

    *strains to come up with glitter joke*

  46. charliemingles Says:

    *gives up*

  47. Dave Says:

    I just want to know why all these children are finding themselves attracted to fat, washed-up bastards. Perverts, I say.

  48. Joanne Says:

    I’ve had a bit of a soft spot for Jodie Marsh since I saw her on some awful show where ‘celebrities’ work as holiday reps. She came across as really sweet and fairly humble. And apparently she gives buckets of money to charity n all.

  49. The Tombstone Says:

    How dare you remove my idiocy. I demand the right to be an idiot.

  50. Swineshead Says:

    Not when it’s offensive, Tombstone – despite the fact that what you said was pig-ignorant, this is a public site. So watch your tongue, or you’ll get no dinner.

  51. extremelisteningmode Says:

    Jodie Marsh makes me sad to be in her species.

  52. Dave Says:

    ELM – Cadbury’s Caramel bunny?

  53. Badger Madge Says:

    she’s always saying she was bullied. bullied at school, in the bb house… blah blah blah…

  54. The Tombstone Says:

    Who was offended by that? If anything people who have *that disease* would quite like these two harlots to get *that disease* because if they have to suffer with *that diesease* then it’s unfair that these disgusting excuses for a human being are still walking around. Besides these two have more money than I’ll ever have so I highly doubt they would care if I wished *that disease* on them.

    And if it’s BM chicken kievs I’ll be glad to go hungry.

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