NewsGush: Wonder on Ross


Well, looks like Jonathan ‘Get-Someone-Else-In’ Ross’s booking department have stepped up a gear. Musical genius Stevie Wonder will be his guest this week.

But, at the end of this quote, it says Jonathan Ross will join Wonder and play drums on a tune with him…

Can Ross even play the drums? Is this a joke?

In a rare TV interview Stevie Wonder expresses his support for US presidential candidate Barack Obama.

“I’m saying what we need is change in America, we must become a united people. America needs Barack Obama, it’s that simple,” he says.

“When people talk about colour it makes me laugh. I see a spirit in his heart. I believe him and trust that his heart is seeing truth and that’s why I’ll be voting for him, no question. We have to grow up as a world. You have to understand that you can’t have change if you have fear.”

Stevie Wonder also talks about never being able to see: “Some doctors are working on a chip that enables a blind person to see. For me, I’m not eligible but there are thousands of people who are [eligible] and I want to make sure they get the chance.”

And Jonathan joins Stevie on drums in a medley of his greatest hits performed live in the studio.


Anyhow – no doubt Ross will manage to bring up his usual themes up throughout the interview – his toilet habits, penis size and having gay feelings for his male interviewees. Ho hum.

Can’t Frank Skinner take over?


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112 Responses to “NewsGush: Wonder on Ross”

  1. piqued Says:

    Ross has pushed it as far as it will go, I stopped watching him ages ago but still thing he was a good replacement fro Barry Norman

    Give the job to Bradley Walsh, he was charming on Maestro and I for one a’[rghiope[t9ug\rmjipfl[jkhuryipsogk,v[a]
    B.P;GDH N

  2. ugeine Says:

    Give the job to Jeremy Kyle, that would be even better.

    Pete Doherty: So, er, yeah, er, recording the new album…

    JK:You’re a disgrace!

    PD: Hang on, I think that’s a bit

    JK: Shut it, you stupid junky scumbag! Get a bloody job!

    PD: Er, I’m a proff…


    PD: Well, er, I’m on the guest thing




  3. Swineshead Says:

    Ahaha – that made me chuckle. Both of those there comments. Them.

  4. The Tombstone Says:

    There is only one man for the BBC Friday night talk show and that man is David Mitchell.

  5. Swineshead Says:

    Not sure about that, Tombs. I think, by definition, a talkshow host has to be a bit of a nob – but like a mate who’s a bit of a nob – you can stomach it as they’re charismatic.

  6. Clarry Says:

    Yeah, but he’s not really funny at anything other than on Peep Show. Oh yeah, Sleaford (and the surrounding villages) also produced Robert Webb. FACT.

  7. The Tombstone Says:

    David Mitchell is king of the panel show, making all others look stupid and unfunny in the process. He is charasmatic, his lack of natural charm is really quite charming. Imagine him talking to attractive movie stars and playing on his own insecurities, it would be amazing to watch.

  8. Swineshead Says:

    Christ – Tombstone’s been struck by cupid’s arrow…

  9. piqued Says:

    Clarry! Do you not listen to Radio 4?

  10. Clarry Says:

    I hate panel shows and won’t watch them, so wouldn’t know about his prowess in that domain. Don’t get me wrong, I love the man and his cleverness – but I can’t bear to watch him in anything other than Peep Show as that is possibly my fave funny of the last 10 years and only want to think of him as Mark. Must be awful for actors/comics/musicians who strike it lucky with their first offering, never to be repeated in subsequent offerings.

  11. The Tombstone Says:

    Although thinking about it he also hates all music and doesn’t know anything about it so the musical guests may be a problem. Ah, well back to rubbing one out to the 1st series of Peep Show for me.

  12. charliemingles Says:

    I love both david mitchell and stevie wonder(certainly the early stuff)

    I also still enjoy ross’ tv chat show, but have got sick of him on his radio show. weird.

    I much prefer adam and joe these days.

    I agree about the first two comments also. rather amusing.

  13. Swineshead Says:

    Do you not listen to Radio 4?

    Here we go again…

    Listening to Radio 4 doesn’t mean you’re clever and doesn’t mean you’re cultured. It just means you’re middle class.

  14. The Tombstone Says:

    He’s not acting when he plays Mark though. He IS Mark, that’s why he’s so naturally funny because Mark and David Mitchell are one and the same. He’s only crap in stuff like The Mitchell and Webb stuff where he’s trying to be anything other than himself/Mark.

  15. piqued Says:

    Erm, I was making a point re. his show…

  16. The Tombstone Says:

    My favourite radio station is radio 2.

  17. Swineshead Says:

    Erm, you were using Radio 4 as a badge of pride, again.
    Don’t backtrack, bitch, your card’s marked.

    *loads rifle*

  18. piqued Says:

    Why on earth would I do that?

  19. charliemingles Says:

    I agree tombstone. he is just playing himself and whats so great about seeing/hearing him on panel games is its just mark somehow appearing on tv, albeit a much wittiet version. excellent toff stuff.

  20. Clarry Says:

    P – Yes I do and Radio 7, but i’m not talking about that. I’m talking about Mitchell in progs on channel 4 and the Beeb, doing shit panel progs and hawking that nonsense ‘That Mitchell and Webb look’ etc.

  21. Swineshead Says:

    For the same reason you’re dying to be seen as a ‘foodie’…

    And dying to cloak your knicker-stealing washing-line past…

  22. The Tombstone Says:

    Hang on is someone actually agreeing with me on something here? That can’t be right surely.

  23. piqued Says:


    Tombstone, you’re wrong

    Clarry, there were some ace bit in Mitchell and Webb, acersz

  24. The Tombstone Says:



  25. charliemingles Says:

    yes tombstone. that was me. your balls must have dropped.

  26. Swineshead Says:

    Mitchell & Webb was pretty poor with a couple of stand out moments.

    And it was made by Nazis and is horrifically right wing.

  27. Clarry Says:

    P – Sorry, I’m one of those people who gives something a few watches, and if it doesn’t amuse me then it is struck off, forever. I am too lazy to pick through the bones to find the tasty morsels of comedy…. sozzersz

  28. Napoleon Says:

    Warburton’s bread has gone down the pan, just like Hovis’s did a few years ago. Who do I turn to now? Where do I go for pre-sliced bread?

  29. The Tombstone Says:

    Mitchell & Webb had its moments. Definetely didn’t transfer well to the stage though. I wondered what that funny feeling was in my scrotum.

  30. Clarry Says:

    ANS: Cutty bread is the best.

  31. The Tombstone Says:

    Supermarket home-brand white bread is the best bread there is.

  32. indy Says:

    peep show – 10 out of 10
    mitchell & webb – not that great

    but the greatest moment in their careers must be when they made microsoft seem sympathic in comparison to apple in “that” advert. did not turn out that well for apple, did it?

  33. Napoleon Says:

    Cutty bread? What the fuck’s that?

  34. Clarry Says:

    Bread whats you cut yourself.

  35. piqued Says:

    NC, I buy whole loaves fresh, in addition to it being cheaper it’s better quality, and then I slice it when I get in and bung it in the freezer. When ready a slice takes 10 mins to defrost or you can just bung it in the toaster.


  36. Clarry Says:

    Having reread your initial question I see you were asking for the best type of pre-cut bread. My apologies.

  37. Swineshead Says:

    Piqued – bread from the freezer tastes like bread from the freezer when thawed. Fine when you’re toasting it, but not if you want a sandwich.

    Tombstone – Ian Huntley comment – how is that funny? Using the name of a child-killer thinking it’ll somehow resonate with humour… for fuck’s sake.


  38. Swineshead Says:

    Clarry – he was.

  39. Napoleon Says:

    Piqued – Thanks for that advice about this mysterious fresh bread you have to slice with a knife. I’ll have to check that out at some stage.

    It doesn’t, however, answer the question I asked.

  40. Dave Says:

    The Late Late Show with Craig Ferguson – watch it to see what Channel 4 lost.

  41. Clarry Says:

    Hmmmm, toasted cutty bread with lashings of Lurpak and marmite or thick cut marmalade (dinner and pudding).

  42. charliemingles Says:

    my dad worked for beatties bakeries for 20 years. they make mothers pride. we had to eat that all through our childhood out of loyalty. I wouldnt recommend it. its shit.

  43. piqued Says:

    President butter is the best Clarry, knocks the rest into a cocked hat

    NC, Sainsbury do a stonking white batch loaf

  44. Dave Says:

    I don’t think Huntly’d get his hands on a minor part like Huntley.

  45. Napoleon Says:

    And is that sliced white bread?

  46. Dave Says:

    Shit. I meant I don’t think Mitchell’d get his hands on a minor part like Huntley. It’s a good gag.

  47. piqued Says:

    They can slice it for you in store.

  48. Swineshead Says:

    I’m being a twat am I, Tombstone?

    I see.

  49. Napoleon Says:

    Might give that a go, then.

  50. Mikey Says:

    Piqued, to be honest I am little disappointed in you, what with your Guardian/Radio 4/Foodie credentials. I would have thought you would be baking your own loaves with one of those nifty breadmaking machines that one sees. Frozen word!

  51. The Tombstone Says:

    No, you’re probably not. It’s probably me.

  52. Swineshead Says:

    I’m afraid Tombstone’s gone. He got run over by the spam detector.

  53. Napoleon Says:

    My mother used to freeze bread, then defrost slices for my school sandwiches. Absolutely fucking horrible, they were.

  54. Mikey Says:

    I go for Anchor butter.

  55. Napoleon Says:

    I’m a pleb, so I use Clover. It spreads easy.

  56. Swineshead Says:

    I use utterly butterly – even more of a pleb – or a normal person – one of the two

  57. ugeine Says:

    Radio 1 in the evenings is too highbrow for me. i only listen to Virgin Radio.

  58. piqued Says:

    Funny you should say that M, I was planning on making my own… Wouldn’t use a breadmaker though

  59. Swineshead Says:

    Oh Piqued, for fuck’s SAKE.

  60. Mikey Says:

  61. piqued Says:



    It must’ve been the ‘we all love Clover, all over the land’ advert that got you eating that plastic muck


  62. Napoleon Says:

    I buy Utterly Butterly when they have it on offer at TESCO’s. They usually have it on for a pound … and you’d be mad to turn that down.

    As for radio, I listen to Virgin Classic Rock and Planet Rock mostly. It means I can remain in the time warp I got stuck in in 1994.

  63. Dave Says:

    LIDL do a great range of bread mixes. Nice German style loaves that arge great with a huge nob of butter with mulled wine.

  64. piqued Says:

    SH… I found a really simple recipe…

  65. Swineshead Says:

    Clover’s alright.

    Why are you such a snob? Does it make you feel good?

    Even that ‘wouldn’t use a breadmaker’ thing was snobbish.

  66. Napoleon Says:

    Piqued – No, I don’t buy things because of adverts. I buy it because I tried it and liked it. You fucking snob.

  67. piqued Says:

    Nothing to do with being a snob SH

    It’s a question of taste and I don’t like things fucked about with

  68. piqued Says:

    What’s all this snob shit, I don’t like fucking margarine, Jesus

    Show me where I implied the working classes prefer fucking Clover or whatever plastic balls you prefer to spread on your bread?

  69. Swineshead Says:

    It’s all about being a snob. You shop at Sainsbury’s – everything there is fucked about with.

  70. Swineshead Says:

    It’s more that you’re sounding like the demographic the Observer magazine is aimed at (ie a bunch of snobs).

  71. piqued Says:

    Of course not eveything at Sainsbury is fucked about with, no more so than ‘foodstuffs’ anywhere else. Besides depends on what you buy

    You read The Guardian/Observer as much as I do… What’s with all this working class hero crap, you’re as middle class as I am

  72. Mikey Says:

    Sainsbury’s is the poor mans Waitrose and the rich mans Tescos.

  73. piqued Says:

    btw, you’re wrong about butter too, it’s margarine that’s aimed at the middle classes.

  74. Napoleon Says:

    Clover’s not marge, anyway. I never liked marge.

  75. piqued Says:

    What is it then?

  76. Dave Says:

    LIDL has a great marge – I can’t believe it’s not I can’t believe it’s not butter.

  77. Swineshead Says:

    I’ve boycotted the Observer. Guardian’s next.
    I never said I wasn’t middle class. It’s fine to be middle class. What a crap retort. It’s one thing being middle class and another to be obnoxiously so.

    And yes – pretty much everything in Sainsbury’s is fucked with, even that organic stuff. If you were true to this principle you’d buy everything from a fucking farmer’s market – but that’s too much of a chore, so you go to the supermarket like everyone else. Which is hypocritical.

    Now before you ask why I’m picking on you, you started this by patronising margarine users and those who eat sliced bread.

  78. Napoleon Says:

    “btw, you’re wrong about butter too, it’s margarine that’s aimed at the middle classes.”

    Well it was about seventy years ago, Piqued.

  79. Napoleon Says:

    It’s buttermilk and oil. Marge is just oil.

  80. Swineshead Says:

    LIDL has a great marge – I can’t believe it’s not I can’t believe it’s not butter.

    Appreciate the comic relief there – chuckled at that.

  81. Napoleon Says:

    Did you read that world health organisation thing that found organic food to be no better for you than ordinary food? I could have told you that without needing vast quantities of research.

  82. Napoleon Says:

    At least I think it was the WHO … could be thinking of some other collection of boffins.

  83. Who Says:

    David Mitchell admitted that the last CD he bought was No Jacket Required and hasn’t felt the need to buy another since. I kind of love him lots for that. And didn’t they tell us that all yellow fat spreads are bad, except for real butter, which is alright?

  84. piqued Says:

    Obnoxiously middle class? ME! Don’t talk such utter shit

    A farmers market in Tooting? Oh yes, can’t move for them round here

    As for being a hypocrite for buying food that doesn’t bankrupt me, yes, sorry about that. I’m keen to avoid the pitfalls of death by eating things

  85. Napoleon Says:

    Who – Don’t listen to THEM. They’re the ones who get their advice from ‘nutritionists’ – a collection of people who make up all their ‘science’ as they go along.

    Ask a doctor, and he’ll tell you to cut out the fags ‘n’ booze, eat plenty of fresh fruit ‘n’ veg and exercise regularly. And that’s it.

  86. Who Says:

    Oh, I don’t hold with THEM, or doctors. I like the hydrogenated vegetable oils in solid form. On a Tuesday, I like to strip off, slather myself in Utterley Butterley and wait for them to come and get me.

  87. Napoleon Says:

    What’s ‘hydrogenated’? Is it in brown sauce?

  88. piqued Says:

    Right, I’m off now, I have to take Jocasta to the Ballet and Teddy is starting Judo tonight. Popping by Waitrose on the way to get some Fois Gras and Truffles for supper, we’ve got the Hamilton’s over for Bridge at 9.

  89. Napoleon Says:

    That’s pretty much word-for-word what you said as a farewell a few months ago when someone accused you of being a posh git.

  90. Dave Says:

    Isn’t class all blurred these days?

    Me and my sister came from the same whom – she’s a published lecturer that would make Piquids foodie habits look reserved, I’m a grotty call centre drone that’ll tonight dine on pasta and tuna mixed with mayo.

  91. Napoleon Says:

    It is, Dave. My father was a working class cunt, my mother was born working class, yet is now so middle class it hurts, her father is a working class racist electrician, and I turned out to be a boorish yobbo with no bloody idea what class I’m meant to be in. It’s a right royal mess, so it is, so it is.

  92. Swineshead Says:

    Obnoxiously middle class? ME! Don’t talk such utter shit

    Another great comeback!

    Sorry, but you do veer into that territory with alarming regularity these days. This foodie shit – I just think you should drop it, dear. You sound like Kathyrn fucking Flett or Polly Vernon.

  93. Swineshead Says:

    I don’t care what class anyone’s from, so long as they’re not obnoxious about it.

  94. Dave Says:

    My mum was a primary school teacher and my dad a photocopier engineer. So they have different ideas about their class.

    And, since they buggered off to a cottage in the hills, they’ve hooked on to a load of Daily Mail reading arses. I go drunk and berated one after he started spouting his views about immigration and the ‘scum’ that lived in the council housing nearby. I worked with a girl who he considered as ‘scum’ and she was a hard working young mother, the arse. AND!!!! One of the arses fell out with my mum because she decided to go back to teaching whilst this bitch, a bingo winged ex-art teacher, thought working at the age of 50 was ‘common’.

    Strange world.

  95. Napoleon Says:

    He’s buggered off home to eat weeds or whatever the hell that stuff’s called they sell in bags. I’m having a steak ‘n’ kidney pie for my tea – lovely.

  96. Swineshead Says:

    Oh – one other thing – you’re living in Tooting – so what? All kinds of folk are scattered in every part of every borough in London – there aren’t poor areas any more. I’m sure there are gastropubs in Tooting, toots.

    Anyway, as a wannabe ‘working class hero’ I’m off home for gravel and mash washed down with lashings of margarine, after a bout of wife-bashing.

    Ta ra, cock.

  97. Dave Says:

    Sentences -structure, I need to, better.

  98. ugeine Says:

    Dad: Stop playing those bleeding computer games and do something more constructive with your time, they’re rotting your brain!

    Me: Stop reading that bleeding Daily Mail and do something more constructive with your time, it’s rotting your brain!

  99. Napoleon Says:

    To be honest, I’d prefer to be upper class. All they do all day is drink, gamble, smoke cigars and get up to all sorts with sexually deviant posh fillies.

  100. ugeine Says:

    We’re all upper class, in a global sense.

  101. Napoleon Says:

    Ugeine – After recently completing the magnificent Bioshock, I would agree with your dad. I lost so much sleep over that game, my brain’s now the size of an ant’s.

  102. ugeine Says:

    Yeah, he’s probably right.

    Cripes, is that out yet? How did you get one?

  103. Napoleon Says:

    Bioshock came out last year, didn’t it? I picked it up second-hand in one of those games exchange places.

    Anyway, it’s an incredible game. Never played anything quite like it in my life. I’d recommend it to anyone.

  104. Dave Says:

    Bioshock’s great but I hope you’re playing it on PC!

  105. Napoleon Says:

    I was, yes. Smashing looking thing it is – a genuine work of art. And a complete pain in the arse when all them ‘orrible splicer things jump out at you as you’re trying to listen to one of Andrew Ryan’s messages.

  106. charliemingles Says:

    whats bioshock about? I only do the ones which involve killing people with machine guns and sniper rifles.

  107. Clarry Says:

    “LIDL has a great marge – I can’t believe it’s not I can’t believe it’s not butter.

    Appreciate the comic relief there – chuckled at that.”

    I saw something similar the other day, which was simply called ‘I don’t believe it!’, it didn’t even pretend to be any sort of foodstuff, butter, margerine or otherwise.

  108. goerge Says:

    Ah, didn’t realise you mean the PC version. I’ve been wanting that for ages, sadly my computer struggles to run football manager, which is basically a spreadsheet.

  109. Fudmuncher Says:

    Having seen the words “Stevie Wonder” and “penis” in the same article reminded me of one of the weirdest fucking records of all time, John Trubee’s “Peace & Love”, which mentioned both. Full story at Mark E Smith has a copy, just search youtube for Mark E Smith Vinyl Villians. It has a nice segment where he plays the record while asphyxiating Adam Buxton.

    Music trivia fit over…as you were.

  110. Brian Says:

    hey, stevie wonder made a really hope loaded quote on the show with jonathan ross… does anyone have it is type???
    I cant veiw bbc programmes online where I am…

    it was a pretty profound few lines right after he was talking about his supporet for Barrack obama…


  111. Swineshead Says:

    Brian… Apparently it’s from one of his 80’s albums and is called Fear Can’t Put Dreams To Sleep. Dodgy transcription of lyrics I found after serious googling…

    From out of the blue, there came to me a question, the kinda tell you answer won’t let you be, the question was, if I was blessed with a gift of sight, what most in life I want to see, that made me think of an old story, about a boy who had no control of his feet or hands, who was asked if he could walk and touch again what he would do, and he said as I understand,
    If my eyes were to see , let them be the witness of a world that is color free,
    If my limbs were to move let them touch and walk this land when hate no longer be,
    And if my ears were to hear let it be like the sweetest music be unity and harmony,
    And should my mouth start to speak let me talk about a land where love’s for all
    And fear can’t put dreams to sleep.

    Hope that helps. Stevie’s daughter was quite lovely….

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