The Friday Question – Chat Splat

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Unexpected amusement there, in the shape of Dizzee Rascal being interviewed by an entertained but slightly bewildered Paxman on Newsnight this week. Certainly a better performance from Dizzee than the one on that godawful single he did with Calvin Harris.

One for their archive, to sit alongside Napoleon… sorry, Mark E Smith‘s confusing turn with Gavin Esler just after John Peel passed away.

It’s always fun when someone unexpected turns up and starts acting all crazy and twisted on a chat or news show. And it’s even more fun when someone expected turns up and behaves badly. The Word was always good for live music and an interviewing shambles (if it was good for anything) and in their golden period of idiotic interviews, their head to head with the Godfather of public appearances, Mr. Ollie Reed stands head and shoulders above the rest.

Though Rod Hull‘s was pretty good, considering that (and I think I’ve got the dates right) Snoop was on a murder charge at the time.

So – what about you?

What are your favourite, archived TV interviews?

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273 Responses to “The Friday Question – Chat Splat”

  1. Toothed Varmint Says:

    Grace Jones. I love Grace Jones anyway. But there was an interview when he started hitting the guy (who was it?) and being very annoyed that he had other guests and not just her.

  2. Toothed Varmint Says:

    I mean “she started hitting the guy”. She, not he. As we’re talking about Ms Jones, it might well be a Freudian slip and not just a typo.

  3. Swineshead Says:

    It was Russell Harty, I believe. She beat him up. I’d let her beat me up.

    That Dizzee Rascal clip is my new favourite thing, innit.

  4. Toothed Varmint Says:

    Hip-hop plays a big part in it, innit. Rispek. I like Dizzy.

  5. ugeine Says:

    What happens in the dizzee one?

  6. Swineshead Says:

    He’s right, mind you.

  7. Toothed Varmint Says:

    I am so fucking uncool, I even spelled Dizzee’s name wrong. I am not down with the kids anymore. O, cruel mother Time.

  8. Dave Says:

    Kurt Russell on Parkinson.

  9. Swineshead Says:

    It’s up there Ugeine? Or have you no access?

    If not – there’s a strange atmosphere due to a mutual respect between the two. Paxman seems a bit flummoxed at ‘Mr Rascal’s rapidfire abrupt response, and ultimately amused at his idealist responses.

    It’s weirdly touching.

  10. Nick T Says:

    “Mr Rascal”
    Priceless….

  11. Toothed Varmint Says:

    He is right, actually.
    I love Paxman’s expression during the interview. Clearly amused, sympathetic and interested but aware that this is weird for a newsnight guest to be so outspocken and natural. Lovely stuff.

  12. Swineshead Says:

    Kurt Russell – what’d he do? Get his winkle out?

  13. Nick T Says:

    I know it’s off topic but please indulge me…..http://uk.youtube.com/watch?v=L8eh72REd_s&feature=rec-HM-fresh

  14. Dave Says:

    No. He spoke of dealing with age, a stroke and the imprtance of educating the young people about plotics n’stuff.

    You got your winkle out.

  15. Dave Says:

    plotics? politics.

    I’m young, haven’t had a stroke by the way. Although, that’s not always too clear.

    LAVENDER COLOURED HONEYPOTS.

  16. Badger Madge Says:

    I bloody want Dizzee for PM! Love how they both are coming from opposite spectrums of society, and both think the other is weird! Wonderful stuff.

    To answer: that crazy Tracey Emin and her weird freakish finger, Lady Macca (again), Kerry Katona on This Morning a few weeks ago, Gwynnie on Parkie…

  17. Swineshead Says:

    Christ Badger, you seem to enjoy cringeing.

  18. Toothed Varmint Says:

    Meg Ryan on Parkie. That wasn’t entertaining, just cringy.

  19. Toothed Varmint Says:

    I also liked the spat between young, eager, twinkly Ian Hislop and dear old drunken, belligerent Tom Waits on some late-night Channel 4 show.

  20. ugeine Says:

    Aw. I hoped it was a rap battle where Paxman started off on the offensive but Dizzee launched into a faultless rendition of stop dat.

  21. ugeine Says:

    Simon Amstell on Popworld with the Kooks. Still gets me in stitches.

  22. wally bazoom Says:

    Anyone on the Paul O’Grady show – they always end up holding a dog that needs a home. Carrying it off with dignity is a true test of character.

  23. ugeine Says:

    Ian Hislop Vs Tom Waits? Why do i hear all the good youtube videos when I can’t use youtube?

  24. Toothed Varmint Says:

    Paxman should make a Children-in-Need video doing rap battle with Dizzee and other kids. In his M&S underpants. That would show Wogan with his stupid break-dancing turn.

  25. Swineshead Says:

    I watched some Paul O G whilst on my sickbed – Ross Kemp is guest host and it was actually quite good fun.

    I forgot about Amstell – the Kooks interview was utterly brilliant. As was seeing the Strokes interviewed by a talking horse.

  26. Toothed Varmint Says:

    Waits was murmuring something and Hislop asked him to speak up. Waits didn’t like that very much.

  27. Dave Says:

    Amstell interviewing Duran Duran was good n’all.

    But how shit is he at presenting Buzzcocks at the moment? He’s so shit it’s all lovely and endearing. The format was all but reversed last night.

  28. wally bazoom Says:

    That thing with the small child and the fun science was ace. Kemp looked out of his depth, though. Cilla Black bemused.

  29. Swineshead Says:

    Not a fan of Russell Howard, mind you. I really can’t see what the big deal is with him.

    Amstell is good at Buzzcocks, Dave. We’ve told you this and you still refuse to listen, with your misshapen ears and face made of jelly.

  30. ugeine Says:

    The shoot for this video sees his band playing over a waterfall. He got this idea when he was looking through a book of music clichés.

    Can’t remember what band it was (Maybe maroon five?) but that was a good line from Amstell. He’s good at Buzzcocks.

    Also, out of Waits and Hislop, waits would win hands down. Don’t think Hislop could stand a chance.

  31. Toothed Varmint Says:

    I like Amstell a lot and he’s miles better than that cock Lamarr. I started watching Buzzcocks when Simon took over.

  32. Dave Says:

    You grunge-loving throwback of the 90s. You hoody wearing, filthy, thirty-year-old mosher. Amstell fluffs his lines, and can’t even rhetort with the singer off of Alphabeat. You can’t have that on Buzzcocks. He was on the backfoot for the full show last night.

  33. ugeine Says:

    Not EVEN the singer from Alphabeat? You couldn’t make it up!

  34. Do I not like that! Says:

    http://uk.youtube.com/watch?v=hgHcZqIfhcA

  35. Toothed Varmint Says:

    I don’t think there’s any big deal about Russell Howard. He’s just there. He’s a safe bet – kinda funny but not too funny, like a thinner version of Jo Brand.

  36. Swineshead Says:

    You grunge-loving throwback of the 90s. You hoody wearing, filthy, thirty-year-old mosher.

    You fat, sexless twat. Fuck off.

  37. Swineshead Says:

    I don’t possess a hoodie, by the way. If I did, Would there be a problem with that?

    You’re a fucking bozo, Dave. A total fucking bozo.

  38. Nick T Says:

    Fonejacker, the “buddy bun bun” one. It’s missing from the utube, sadly.

  39. Swineshead Says:

    Mikey – Excellent choice. There’s a little bit of genius about Ian Holloway. Only a tiny sliver, but it’s there. I’ve got no sound – was that the quote about taking a dodgy looking girl home in a cab?

  40. Nick T Says:

    *Is wearing a hoodie*

    *is 44*

  41. Toothed Varmint Says:

    I don’t know who Ian Holloway is (apart from him being a football player of some sort), but that clip is well funny. He has a way with words.

  42. wally bazoom Says:

    I love grunge! Noel’s House Party was ace!

  43. Dave Says:

    What’s wrong with being fat, or sexless by your logic? Or is that okay to joke about, you cider drinking, forever teenage turd.

  44. Swineshead Says:

    TV – google Ian Holloway’s quotes, he’s football’s number one idiot savant.

  45. ugeine Says:

    This is turning into one of my favourite interviews ever.

  46. Do I not like that! Says:

    Yep Swines that’s the one.

  47. Swineshead Says:

    *is one comment away from sticking Dave in the Tombstone vault*

    A nice conversation about entertaining TV interviews isn’t really the place to bore folk with misplaced insults Dave. Shut the fuck off or I’ll put you on ‘mute’.

  48. Swineshead Says:

    Yes – ‘shut the fuck off’. I invented a new dismissal.

  49. piqued Says:

    Just fucking get rid of him SH

  50. piqued Says:

    (‘shut the fuck off’ is rather good btw)

  51. Swineshead Says:

    If we’re talking football interviews, Brian Clough is worth a mention.

  52. Toothed Varmint Says:

    I’ve got a bright-red hoodie with white CCCP on the front. I wear it on special occasions, like today. Today, my firends, is the 91st anniversary of the Great October Socialist Revolution and I congratulate you all. Please get drunk tonight and think of Lenin.
    Oh, and it’s Wine Celebration Day in Armenia today.

  53. ugeine Says:

    Hack: Gordon, Gordon, can I have a quick word?

    Strachan: Velocity. *walks off*

    One of my favourite football lines.

  54. Toothed Varmint Says:

    Thanks, SH, I will. I like football players’ wit and wisdom.

  55. piqued Says:

    His wife was talking about him on, er, radio, re his statue. Yes, he had some beauties, apparently he was a bloody nice chap (according to his wife anyway)

  56. Swineshead Says:

    Let’s have a few from Strachan:

    Reporter: Welcome to Southampton Football Club. Do you think you are the right man to turn things around?

    Strachan: No. I was asked if I thought I was the right man for the job and I said, “No, I think they should have got George Graham because I’m useless.”

    * * *

    Reporter: Gordon, you must be delighted with that result?

    Strachan: You’re spot on! You can read me like a book.

    * * *

    Reporter: So, Gordon, in what areas do you think Middlesbrough were better than you today?

    Strachan: What areas? Mainly that big green one out there…

  57. Dave Says:

    The Gibb brothers on Clive Anderson’s show! And the rock profile spoof of said interview.

    And can I compliment Swineshead on a brilliant Friday question and mention how much I’ve missed him over the past two days. Thank you.

  58. Swineshead Says:

    Dave, you’re really pissing me off.

  59. piqued Says:

    Dave, move on to your next lead, get on the phone

  60. ugeine Says:

    Jim Carrey’s Jonathon Ross interview. I’m very partisan toward Jim Carrey, and I can understand how people don’t like him, but that interview was brilliant.

  61. Swineshead Says:

    Carrey was alright when Ruby Wax interviewed him too. I’ve no beef with him, but I’ll continue to avoid two out of three of his films like the plague.

  62. ugeine Says:

    That’s exactly what I mean. Him and Mike Myers I love as comic actors, but then again, I can understand how people hate their films. Ben Stiller I love for Zoolander, and I can see how people get annoyed by him.

  63. Swineshead Says:

    There are pubs out there in the Manchester suburbs that NEED a new toilet paper supplier Dave, get cold-calling, you little unloved bitch.

  64. Dave Says:

    Piqued, I don’t work on sales leads thanks. You’re the one working for a company that’s not getting contracts. You’re also practically middleaged so I hope you have a better job than me.

  65. Swineshead Says:

    I watched ten minutes of Zoolander, saw Stiller pull that supposedly amusing face a few times, then turned off. Rubbish.

  66. ugeine Says:

    Remember I like Friends, SH. Seriously, I’m by no means a comedy snob. I could probably get a chuckle or two out of the chuckle brothers if I was mashed enough.

  67. Swineshead Says:

    Dave – he has a much better job than you. Seriously.

    Can you stop being the internets biggest loser for a few minutes so we can discuss how unfunny Ben Stiller is? Ta.

  68. Toothed Varmint Says:

    I hated Zoolander. Will Farrell was crap in it too.
    I like Ben Stiller’s dad.

  69. piqued Says:

    We’ve plenty of contracts alright, but we’ve also plenty of fat work shy cunts like you not getting on the fucking phone and closing deals.

  70. Dave Says:

    He’s practically middleaged, SH.

  71. ugeine Says:

    My three favourite De Niro films: Meet the fockers, Meet the Parents, Analyse this!.

  72. ugeine Says:

    OK, that I made up.

  73. Do I not like that! Says:

    http://uk.youtube.com/watch?v=hgGE3VH_LpE&feature=related

  74. Toothed Varmint Says:

    I am interested – what is a comedy snob? One who watches CYE and despises Only Fools and Horses?
    My favourite comedy used to be Bottom…

  75. piqued Says:

    Back to the topic in hand, one of the most awful interviews ever was George Best on Wogan just before his liver fell off. He kept saying he liked to relax by ‘screwing’, he was more pissed than a Christmas dad.

  76. Swineshead Says:

    He’s got a lovely girlfriend, Dave. And he earns a lot of money.

    I wouldn’t get into comparisons considering you eat Dairylea sandwiches for tea and consider a spunk-spattered copy of an ancient X-Files magazine your life-partner.

    All your youth says for you is that you’ve got plenty more years of misery ahead of you.

  77. Toothed Varmint Says:

    Eric Catona used to be excellent for soundbites.

  78. piqued Says:

    I’m 39 Dave. I’m also 11 stone.

  79. Dave Says:

    You, like, don’t even know me…

  80. wally bazoom Says:

    Ben Stiller is good – I put forward the films Mystery Men and Keeping The Faith as evidence.

  81. Dave Says:

    I’m 13 stone. What of it?

  82. Swineshead Says:

    Don’t get me wrong, Stiller’s done good stuff.

    I’m not a snob, honest. I love Bottom. Dave Hedgehog is among my favourite comedy creations. There’s an example of a Dave who is funny.

  83. piqued Says:

    I know you’re a fat telesales man from Manchester who is top of my fucking shit list

  84. ugeine Says:

    A comedy snob is somebody who’s snobby about comedy, tv. Somebody who thinks good comedy is decided by other factors rather then how much it makes you laugh. That wasn’t a dig at anybody here, like SH said the only reason he didn’t like ZL was that it didn’t make him laugh. I judge comedy by how much it makes my guffaw like Cleetus.

  85. Dave Says:

    I’m not fat, taste is subjective and Manchester’s a great post-industrial town second only to London.

    What I am is ignorant, immature and lazy.

  86. Dave Says:

    And I don’t work in telesales. I work in a callcentre environment. It’s a shit job but not quite that shit.

  87. Swineshead Says:

    You missed off ‘unfunny’, ‘irrelevant’ and ‘boring’ Dave.

    Stop talking now, I want to get back on topic.

    (You are fat)

  88. Dave Says:

    I am not fat.

  89. piqued Says:

    Just read back at what you’ve written Dave, you work this pattern regularly. One minute you all piss and insults the next your Mr. self deprecating ‘woe is me’

    NOW GET ON THE PHONE FATTY

  90. Toothed Varmint Says:

    I didn’t read it as a dig, Ugeine, I just got interested in the term. Thanks for clarifying. I think that people who judge comedy by other factors than it’s funnyness are not so much snobs, more like arseholes. It’s because of people like that we have Rory fucking Bremner.
    I’ve got an urge to watch me some Bottom now. It’s been a while.
    I love the episode on the roof most of all. Oh, and that one on Wimbledon Green.

  91. Swineshead Says:

    Dave – get on topic, fatty.

    Let’s have another of Dave’s favourite interviews…

  92. Swineshead Says:

    I’ve got an urge to watch me some Bottom now. It’s been a while.
    I love the episode on the roof most of all. Oh, and that one on Wimbledon Green.

    Where they’re minding the shop and watching cricket simultaneously? It’s marvellous, but for me the Miss World one is a fucking winner. Money on Miss China. Staying up late, pissed, watching an Emmerdale video… you can’t beat it.

    And the one where they play games (including the legendary chess-fight) is a corker.

    Bottom is made for watching when pissed and laughing uproariously at the stupidity.

  93. Dave Says:

    I’m quite happy in the knowledge I’ve stuff lined up in future that’ll lead to a good career. Several people at work have degrees and it pays the bills, gets you buy whilst you get your shit together.

  94. Swineshead Says:

    DISCLAIMER

    Piqued and I have nothing against people ‘of a certain weight’.

    Just Dave.

  95. Dave Says:

    FUCK OFF.

    Steve Martin on The Last Resort.

  96. Swineshead Says:

    I’m quite happy in the knowledge I’ve stuff lined up in future

    A dairylea sandwich and a wank?

    Wash your hands before both.

  97. Dave Says:

    You’re doing nothing for my anxiety disorder, SH.

  98. Napoleon Says:

    I’m surprised nobody’s mentioned David Icke on Wogan, Ollie on After Dark and Anne Bancroft saying fuck all, again on Wogan.

  99. Swineshead Says:

    I mentioned Ollie Reed as the Godfather, so that’s all encompassing.
    For guests saying fuck all on Wogan, see also: Christopher Lloyd.

    Dave – you do it all to yourself with your bizarre ‘insult / recede’ behaviour pattern. You dick.

  100. ugeine Says:

    He’s a moderation Martyr, SH. Fairly textbook.

  101. Napoleon Says:

    That pompous, shouting Latin teacher fella who shows up on stuff is always worth a laugh / shout at the TV. I forget his name.

  102. indy Says:

    back to subject: anyone seen this one incl mr gainsbourg being very “nice” to whitney houston on a french chat show

  103. Dave Says:

    Anything with Christopher Hitchens entertains.

  104. indy Says:

    “That pompous, shouting Latin teacher fella”

    take away “teacher” and you’ve got mr portillo (satire!)

  105. piqued Says:

    Good Lord, I forgotten what a pretty wonam she was…

    *nips out for a toss*

  106. Napoleon Says:

    Anyone see Bonnie Greer slagging off the BBC last night? Talk about biting the hand that feeds you. Without that arsehole show they tack onto the end of Newsnight, hardly anyone would know who she was.

  107. Swineshead Says:

    That pompous, shouting Latin teacher fella who shows up on stuff is always worth a laugh / shout at the TV. I forget his name.

    Colin Davies.

  108. piqued Says:

    That’s right ‘wonam’

    *washes hands*

  109. Swineshead Says:

    What was she saying, NC?

  110. Napoleon Says:

    Indy – Except that Portillo isn’t shouty, and on This Week he’s not particularly pompous either.

  111. piqued Says:

    Nappers i lyk davids dimmblebee

  112. Napoleon Says:

    Swineshead – Saying they were cliquey and getting above ’emselves ‘n’ stuff. I forget exactly what she was banging on about because I began bellowing at her.

  113. Swineshead Says:

    Fair enough. ‘Bonnie’ is a scotch word. She must be scotch.

  114. Napoleon Says:

    I like David Dimbleby too. He’s a BBC presenter you can rely on. Not at all like these fly-by-nights Ross and Brand.

  115. ugeine Says:

    Do fictional TV interviews count? Krusty the Klown is a strong contender. When he’s interviewing a falconer and the bird of prey attacks him ‘Ow! Stop this damn bird!’ ‘I can’t! she thinks you’re after her eggs!’ ‘I only ate one!’

  116. Napoleon Says:

    She write plays, apparently. I’ll wager they’re pretty angry plays.

  117. Toothed Varmint Says:

    Alan Partridge also interviewed a falcon-woman on his radio show. That also didn’t go down very well.

  118. ugeine Says:

    Alan Partridge! Is there an episode where he accidentally shoots his guest, or am I imagining things?

  119. Napoleon Says:

    That was the end of Knowing Me Knowing You.

  120. Swineshead Says:

    I saw David Dimbleby unloading Christmas presents on the street I used to live on last December. In Hackney. He’s a rum beggar.

  121. Lord Milky Says:

    Madeley versus Hawking. There could only be one winner really. It wasn’t Richard.

  122. Toothed Varmint Says:

    You are not imagining it, Ugeine, it was his final guest on KMKYWAP, some arsehole critic played by Patrick Marber.

  123. Dave Says:

    I liked his interview with Sir Roger Moore.

  124. ugeine Says:

    Bill O’Riley has to be in there. Telling a 9/11 victim’s son he was a disgrace to his fathers’ memory. Or telling Dawkins that there was lots of proof for Christianity and there was hardly any for atheism.

  125. Toothed Varmint Says:

    Coogan should stop fucking about and do another AP season. Really. He’s never created anything funnier or more durable.

  126. ugeine Says:

    The parole officer was bon.

  127. Napoleon Says:

    I dunno about that, TV. I thought the Paul Calf diaries were just as good.

  128. Dave Says:

    O’Riley did well against Dawkins actually. ‘I’m throwing in with God because you can’t provide me an answer yourself.’ You can’t argue with that, he’d shout over you.

  129. ugeine Says:

    I thought he came across as a jumped up wanker who thinks his misinformed nonopinion on science has more weight then that of a professor of science.

  130. Napoleon Says:

    I’ve only seen this O’Reilly fella on clips. He seems thoroughly objectionable.

  131. ugeine Says:

    Imagine if Littlejohn had a jock older brother.

  132. indy Says:

    o’reilly comes across as a fair and balanced kind of guy. speaking of coogan: that show about the roadie was shit.

  133. Dave Says:

    O’Reilly is it now? Or O’Riley? O RLY?

  134. Napoleon Says:

    Saxondale? I loved that.

  135. Toothed Varmint Says:

    For some reason I was thinking about Coogan the other day and I for me Partridge is his best creation. Calf is good, I can’t argue with that, but Partrige is more relatable and understandable to me personally. I very rarely see uncouth Northern people in my everyday life, but tossers like AP are dime a dozen. He created a tangible archetype is what I’m saying (and I promise to try and stop being so sesquipedalian in the future). Even his most successful non-Partridge creations (in my estimation they are Gareth Cheeseman and Saxondale) are just AP with different haircuts.

  136. indy Says:

    life o’riley (lightning seeds tribute to hard hitting right wing agenda)

  137. Dave Says:

    When I worked at a pub in central Manchester Coogan’s brother was a regular. Good bloke. Coogan used said pub when he wanted a pint during the filming of 24 Hour Party People. He makes us very proud.

  138. piqued Says:

    Christ, tinsel tits Dave

  139. Dave Says:

    What does that even mean?

  140. piqued Says:

    big fat cocks

  141. Napoleon Says:

    Cocks?

  142. piqued Says:

    fat ones, yes

  143. Dave Says:

    What?

  144. Dave Says:

    Tinsel Tits is Evan Davis’s nickname at the BBC. Is that what you mean?

  145. Napoleon Says:

    Now he’s a handsome man. Any relation, Dave?

  146. Dave Says:

    No. He’s like the bastard child of Gary Rhodes and a sloth.

  147. Napoleon Says:

    Are you sure you’re not related?

  148. Dave Says:

    I’m sat in reception doing cover and I’m so bored I’m weighing biros on a set of post scales.

    How many grams do you reckon 1 black, 1 blue biro weighs?

    PIQUED???!!??!

  149. piqued Says:

    long nipples

  150. ugeine Says:

    What would one have to consume to get a 9.5/10 or above for lunch? I have tesco at my mercy.

  151. Toothed Varmint Says:

    Some fried meat and a Red Bull.

  152. Dave Says:

    I’m going to force myself to vomit for dinner, thanks to Piqued’s bullying tactics.

  153. Swineshead Says:

    ‘Bullying tactics’ eh?
    You feel you’ve been bullied.

    Interesting.

  154. Toothed Varmint Says:

    “Vomit for Dinner”.
    Sounds like something The Butthole Surfers might have produced.

  155. Dave Says:

    20g

  156. piqued Says:

    I love the Butthole Surfers TV

  157. Toothed Varmint Says:

    Who doesn’t, Piqued? They vere seminal.

  158. roszs Says:

    *rewinds back 100 posts*

    “Shut the fuck off”

    heh. I hope someone annoys me tonight.

  159. Napoleon Says:

    “Who doesn’t, Piqued? They vere seminal.”

    Me.

  160. Swineshead Says:

    I like some of their stuff.
    And I hope someone annoys Ros tonight.

  161. charliemingles Says:

    how are you feeling swinesy? better?

  162. Dave Says:

    I’ve drawn SH a picture on my blog to say sorry. Piqued won’t get one until I see fit.

  163. Toothed Varmint Says:

    OK, Napoleon doesn’t. That’s not much of a surprise though, innit?

  164. piqued Says:

    Never looked at your blog, Dave, never will

    TV, NC likes ManOwar and Stryper

  165. charliemingles Says:

    Bonnie Greer always gets on my tits whenever she opens her mouth. smug humourless bastard.

  166. Swineshead Says:

    There’s nothing wrong with strippers, Piqued. It’s an honourable trade. A man at work paid a stripper to do a private dance for me once. Marvellous it was, especially when she made her anus wink at me.

    GLORY DAYS.

  167. piqued Says:

    I didn’t mention strippers u pervo

  168. charliemingles Says:

  169. Toothed Varmint Says:

    Owww! Poor tyke.

  170. charliemingles Says:

    good kick eh?

    little bastard.

  171. Toothed Varmint Says:

    I wonder what kind of psychosis this child will develop as a result. Fear of break-dance? Of large auditoriums? Of black people? Or just fear of being kicked in the face with a foot?

  172. charliemingles Says:

    theyre pretty rubber at that age. I reckon he’ll be fine. might just grow up to be a republican.

  173. roszs Says:

    SHUT THE FUCK OFFFF!!!!

    *runs giggling into the night*

  174. Toothed Varmint Says:

    Where is night?

  175. ugeine Says:

    I fucking LOVE manowar!

  176. Swineshead Says:

    Hey Roszs, if you’re going to use that expression at least credit me.

  177. indy Says:

    ugeine: i saw manowar at the 2006 earthshaker festival in, where else, germany. there was a tribute to richard wagner and much sturm und drang. ye-ah!

  178. Swineshead Says:

    Good Youtube link at the bottom here from Adam Buxton. IN YOUR FACE.

    http://adam-buxton.co.uk/ad/2008/11/07/new-president-news/

  179. Toothed Varmint Says:

    Would you suck this for me, Sarah Palin?
    Buxton is great as usual.

  180. piqued Says:

    Utterly brilliant

    (The Road is bloody good an’ all)

  181. charliemingles Says:

    good speech. For me, adam is often hot and miss with his mebox type clips. Buit I like this one.

    Anyone see the daily show last night? theyre fucked – for a while at least until obama starts to fuck up.

  182. charliemingles Says:

    *hit and miss

  183. Toothed Varmint Says:

    I guess in America it’s a democratic media love-in at the moment, like it was here in 1997.

  184. Toothed Varmint Says:

    Will Obama invite rock stars and comedians to the White House? Will the amerian equivalen of Harry Enfield get sloshed and tell the American equivalent of Peter Mandelson that he was rubbish and no-one liked him?
    Will the American equivalent of Noel Gallgher lose respect with the kids?

  185. Toothed Varmint Says:

    Shit, I can’t type. Sorry for your strained eyes.

  186. charliemingles Says:

    things …can only get better!

    I think obama is a sincere guy, but lets face it – his job is impossible.

    People seem unaware that when he says ‘change’ he means them – ie they need to change. The majority of people appear to think that change can happen around them invisibly without them making any effort themselves. people hate change. they just like the idea of it. I’d be very happy to be proved wrong though.

  187. charliemingles Says:

    TV: this is a great satire on the whole thing here:

    http://pushjelly.blogspot.com/2008/11/america-now-only-half-racist.html

  188. indy Says:

    who is the american equivalent of noel gallagher?

    i find it easier to sum up gallagher as the english equivalent of bruce springsteen/kid rock (“bastard child of…”) but it doesn’t work the other way around…

    suggestions?

  189. Dave Says:

    two elves are better than four, as they say

  190. piqued Says:

    Mmm, good question Indy

    How about Slash from Guns and/or Roses

  191. Toothed Varmint Says:

    I haven’t got anything against Obama apart from one thing – he’s a polititian. He may be a “good” polititian, but for me it sounds not unlike “good AIDS” or “good Hodgkinson dicease”.

  192. Toothed Varmint Says:

    Thanks, Charlie! Very apt.

  193. piqued Says:

    One thing, Michael Crichton died yesterday, apparently he was 6’11”

  194. Toothed Varmint Says:

    John Cougar Mellencamp, I think. Or Bruce Hornsby, if he is American.
    Or maybe Huey Lewis with or without his news.

  195. Toothed Varmint Says:

    Chrighton was a very rich beanpole. I liked his early books, actually.

  196. ugeine Says:

    What we need is a band that started off with a couple of good albums, is fronted by a rent a gob twat, that’s been writing poor music for the last ten years and the media regularly fellate.

    Or, Fred Durst.

  197. charliemingles Says:

    Someone has to do it TV. Unless youre suggesting ACTUAL democracy?

    Punters running things? public hangings, suspected paedophiles ( ie single men over 30 who dont shave and cut their grass) being beaten to death and the cheeky girls at number one for ever.

    As Sid Viscious once said: I’ve met the Man in the Street – and he’s a cunt!

  198. piqued Says:

    Slash?

    HELLO

  199. ugeine Says:

    Slash is talented, Piqued. We’re looking for a Noel Gallagher substitute.

  200. ugeine Says:

    TV: Good Sid Vicious quote!

  201. Toothed Varmint Says:

    I am not suggesting actual democracy, Charlie. I don’t agree with the old anarchist postulate that anarchy is the mother of order. I just don’t like polititians. I know it’s childish of me, but just like a child gags on unwanted soup I mentally gag every time I see or hear a polititian. Oily untrustworthy cunts, the whole bleeding lot of them.

  202. piqued Says:

    NG is ‘talented’as well, both are cunts. It works

  203. Toothed Varmint Says:

    It was Charlie who quoted Sid, Ugeine. I totally agree with the quote, incidentally.

  204. Dave Says:

    Will.I.Am

    Idiots.

  205. piqued Says:

    TV, someone once said that whoever desired to be a politician or policeman shouldn’t be allowed precisely because they want to.

  206. ugeine Says:

    Whoops. Nice quote Charlie!

  207. Toothed Varmint Says:

    Now, Piqued, this is an excellent quote! I shall remember it. My feelings exactly, only much better expressed.

  208. ugeine Says:

    I’m mixing up talent and cuntishness I think. They’re not mutually exclusive. Wouldn’t that be like calling Guns and Roses Oasis though? I mean, Guns and Roses have one good album, which is more then Oasis…

  209. Toothed Varmint Says:

    GnR are much funnier than Oasis. Their “November rain” video is a masterpiece of overblown hilarity. Osais are positively provincial next to them.

  210. Dave Says:

    Blue Oyster Cult? We could dust them off.

  211. Toothed Varmint Says:

    Yeah, and Bachman-Turner Overdrive. Keep on truckin’!

  212. charliemingles Says:

    I guess a politician with as much charisma, passion and sincerity as Obama might be powerful enough to galvanise people to change the habits of a lifetime. Having said that – have you ever tried to get anyone to change anything about themselves ever? Its hard enough for any of us to change our own bad selfish habits, trying to change someone else’s is virtually impossible. he only got 53% of the vote.

    I wish him the best really. But he hasnt actually done anything yet. and with a the biggest deficit in history (roughly equivalent to around $35000 for every american) he has no chance of doing anything. If he was a civil rights leader, he’d be fine. But being president, you have to do more than inspire.

  213. Dave Says:

    The only thing that’s constant is change.

  214. piqued Says:

    I beg to differ, I think Appetite is the most over-hyped load of shit ever recorded. The solo on Sweet Child is the only good thing about it, which sort of fucks my ‘Slash’ argument.

    Axl Rose has the worst rock-voice since Fish from Marillion. Shit o la.

    I couldn’t believe it when they went stellar, even Motley Crue are better…

  215. Toothed Varmint Says:

    Well, he wanted it, really-really wanted it. He’s got it. Everyone’s elated. It won’t last.
    All the best to him, naturally. But still.

  216. Dave Says:

    Nothing lasts forever and we both know hearts can change’, is what you meant there TV.

  217. Toothed Varmint Says:

    I really like Luna’s version of Sweet Child o’Mine, much sweeter than GnR’s.

  218. piqued Says:

    CM, you’ve suddenly become very lucid

    I like the cut of your cloth sir

  219. Swineshead Says:

    Piqued’s opinion on music would be interesting if he didn’t like Hawkwind and a whole load of other shite.

  220. Toothed Varmint Says:

    Is that what I meant? I guess I did at that, Dave. Thanks for summing up!

  221. charliemingles Says:

    I think each generation loses their political virginity with different politicians. For some it was margaret thatcher who finally disillusioned them. For me – it was Tony Blair. I’m of the generation who were stupid enough to believe the – Things .. can only get better! bollocks.

    for people a bit younger, I guess Obama has the same effect. Hopefully, he’ll deliver. But deliver what?

    He has the same core policies as clinton – lower taxes for the middle classes (our working classes) and health care reform. Clinton couldnt do health care reform with his deficit and Obama’s is way way greater. They’ll have to get further in debt to china who now have them by the balls already.

  222. charliemingles Says:

    Piqued – you cheeky bastard.

    Im always lucid. Just dont usually display it here. Preferring the nob gags as they get a better response.

  223. piqued Says:

    (early) Hawkwind are fantastic, I won’t have a word said against them SH, you sod

  224. piqued Says:

    ‘Im always lucid. Just dont usually display it here’

    I rest my case m’lud

  225. Dave Says:

    TV – I was doing a GnR line from November Rain. I wasn’t trying to take the Michael, sir.

  226. ugeine Says:

    I thought Appetite was very good. Not the best metal album ever recorded, but still very good. Which, again, trumps anything Oasis have ever recorded. If you’re comparing the media hype of Appetite to the media hype around Oasis you’ve got a point though.

    Don’t get me started on the bloody Motley Crew.

  227. charliemingles Says:

    what – picking me up oi grammar/tenses again Piqued? how tedious.

    Youre better than that sir – hawkwind aside.

  228. piqued Says:

    CM, I wasn’t actually, I was merely making a point -read back

  229. ugeine Says:

    I thought Appetite was very good. Not the best metal album ever recorded, but still very good. Which, again, trumps anything Oasis have ever recorded. If you’re comparing the media hype of Appetite to the media hype around Oasis you’ve got a point though.

    Don’t get me started on the bloody Motley Crew.

  230. wally bazoom Says:

    Hawkwind were only any good when they had that dancer and them blokes on electronics. Even then, they only really had one song.

  231. charliemingles Says:

    some complex and clever semantic point?

    Lets not fight – we are under a burnished new Obama sky and the air is sweet once again. this is a new dawn is it not?

  232. ugeine Says:

    I thought Appetite was very good. Not the best metal album ever recorded, but still very good. Which, again, trumps anything Oasis have ever recorded. If you’re comparing the media hype of Appetite to the media hype around Oasis you’ve got a point though.

    Don’t get me started on the bloody Motley Crew.

  233. Dave Says:

    Me and Piqued are going to Hawkwind together.

  234. piqued Says:

    CM, I’m not fighting or picking you up on your grammar you berk!

    I said you were being (unusually) lucid; you reprimanded me and said you’re always lucid but not on here preferring the gag of nobs, so I rested my case…

    Geddit now?

  235. piqued Says:

    CM, I’m not fighting or picking you up on your grammar you berk!

    I said you were being (unusually) lucid; you reprimanded me and said you’re always lucid but not on here preferring the gag of nobs, so I rested my case…

    Geddit now?

  236. charliemingles Says:

    dont get it, no. But my cheeky ironic tone doesnt always translate to the page Piqued. was never annoyed – again, hawkwind aside.

    what are your thoughts on obamania?

  237. piqued Says:

    Sorry about posting that twice, my PC is being an arse

  238. charliemingles Says:

    In think this is an example where the power of tv to influence opinion will be studied yet again by media academics.

    TV stations across the world just want great images and all those young black and young white middle-class twentysomethings in parks across America whooping with joy makes great tv. But african-americans are only 12% of the population.

    Once Obama starts to get down to the dull business of running the country, we’ll see how conservative middle-america and its news media reacts.

    I heard a great line, I think from Lydon B Johnson: You campaign in poetry but you have to govern in prose.

    Sounds too eloquent for LBJ. But whoever it was, sums it up perfectly.

  239. piqued Says:

    It doesn’t matter CM, essentially, I wasn’t having a pop. I think you hit the Obama situation on the head (hence my ‘lucid’ comment)

    (shame you don’t appreciate the ‘wind)

  240. Dave Says:

    So. I’m seeing HW the day after Piqued. We’re practically boyfriend and girlfriend.

  241. charliemingles Says:

    I have nothing ‘gainst the ‘wind sir.

    It was merely an attempt to indicate flippancy in my response. Each to his own when it comes to music. I’ve got everything from mike oldfield to mary j blige in my collection – with a kylie minogue best of in between. Whatever gets your though the night, say I.

    Did you see that great Push Jelly article I linked to above? he nailed it very well, I think. I was going to write a satirical piece on Obama -but he did it much better here:

    http://pushjelly.blogspot.com/2008/11/america-now-only-half-racist.html

  242. charliemingles Says:

    channel that cyncism someplace useful dave and you might get somewhere young man.

  243. piqued Says:

    I did indeed, it reminded me of The Onion to be sure

    *does Irish jig*

    *falls off park bench and smashed teeth on bin*

  244. ugeine Says:

    Why did that post three times?

  245. charliemingles Says:

    one of my favourite Onion pieces:

    http://www.theonion.com/content/news/man_finally_put_in_charge_of

  246. Dave Says:

    WHat cynicism, Mingles? It sounds like good advice but what do I apply to what?

    I’m trying to reach Piqued with our common gig ticket purchases yet he hates me and I find that hard to cope with.

  247. Swineshead Says:

    Watched this while I was off sick. Can’t believe this was lost in daytime programming when it was eye-opening, quality output.

    http://www.teachers.tv/video/26563

    This sort of thing should be on instead of Gordon frigging Ramsay. I really enjoyed it.

  248. piqued Says:

    Dave, your post yesterday has fucked you

  249. charliemingles Says:

    thats the batty man thing? I’ll watch that later.

    Sorry dave – my mistake.

  250. charliemingles Says:

    whats that piqued? did you mention someone called dave? hes gone now, I think. yeah, left the internet yesterday, never to be heard from again.

  251. Dave Says:

    It was a childish joke. I withdraw it and naturally apologise unreservedly to all concerned. I haven’t apologised up until now because I didn’t want people to think I was reacting to the offence itself.

    Hare Krishna x 100

  252. piqued Says:

    ‘I haven’t apologised up until now because I didn’t want people to think I was reacting to the offence itself’

    That makes no sense

  253. Swineshead Says:

    Have you learned nothing??

    Dave makes no sense.

  254. charliemingles Says:

    did someone mention Dave? he left days ago. havent heard from him.

  255. Dave Says:

    ‘ haven’t apologised up until now because I didn’t want people to think I was reacting to the offence itself. ‘

    I meant offence cause, not committed.

  256. ugeine Says:

    http://www.guardian.co.uk/culture/tvandradioblog/2008/nov/07/never-mind-the-buzzcocks

    Tosh, piffle, and balderdash. Those are three words I don’t use lightly, as well.

  257. piqued Says:

    What?

  258. piqued Says:

    U, I posted that hours ago

  259. piqued Says:

    Sorry U, I did post it but my PC crashed and it didn’t appear

  260. Dave Says:

    The offence I caused in your heart, not the action I took in committing an offence (crime).

  261. charliemingles Says:

    as stated previously – this show has been rubbish for ages.

  262. piqued Says:

    Why can’t you just apologise like an normal person without trying so hard to be clever?

    You made an offensive remark. Period

  263. charliemingles Says:

    dave, you need to find an interesting job, rather than using this site just to vent your frustrations by irritating people for no apparant reason.

    werent you starting in a lawyers or something?

  264. Dave Says:

    I like Amstell but he has changed the dynamic of the show, especially last night’s. It’s not a band thing, it just means he’s deflecting insults from guests and not the other way around.

  265. ugeine Says:

    Yeah, wordpress is a strange and unruly mistress this afternoon.

  266. ugeine Says:

    Would anybody mind me squeezing out a blog on Buzzcocks?

  267. Dave Says:

    I’m sorry, Piqued.

  268. piqued Says:

    Accepted

  269. Swineshead Says:

    Ugeine – go for it sonny.

  270. ugeine Says:

    Cheers!

    *bounds off to word*

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  272. Used Horse Tack Says:

    I don’t care what any of you say, he is right.

  273. Nick of the T Says:

    Who care what used saddle salesman says, unless one is looking for a used saddle….

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