NewsGush: Delboy’s Dad

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Having already tainted his copybook with The Green Green Grass, John Sullivan – writer of Only Fools and Horses – is now touting the possibility of a prequel to his finest work.

According to Digital Spy, Nicholas Lyndhurst will play a gangster in the show, which will detail the exploits of Del and Rodneys’ father, Freddy Robdal. All Lyndhurst and Sullivan need is the green light, then they’re off, apparently.

“Nick and I are both on board the train, if you like, waiting to arrive at the station.”

Other programmes that have inspired prequels include Casualty, Last of the Summer Wine and Eastenders.

They were all rubbish.

Maybe Sullivan should stop meddling with the past so we can enjoy the repeated image of Delboy, in the 80s, falling through the bar and Trigger making a face.

Because that’s what we like.

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74 Responses to “NewsGush: Delboy’s Dad”

  1. indy Says:

    any suggestions on good TV-prequels? swedish tv has not found out about the prequels yet so i guess we’ve been spared the agony.

  2. indy Says:

    and by the way:

    “The Charlie’s Angels actor Farrah Fawcett, who has been fighting cancer for the last three years, has reportedly been admitted to a Los Angeles hospital.” (http://www.guardian.co.uk/world/2009/apr/06/television)

    (un-?)fortunately i am too young to have any opinions on the original charlie’s angels. i got to admit i liked the “full throttle” one though. i blame the hangover.

  3. Swineshead Says:

    Indy just posed a Friday question on a Monday. I can’t fight it!

    How about ‘Walford Hill’ – back at school with Phil, Minty, Gary, Ricky, Ian Beale and permanent truant, the doomed Martin Fowler.

  4. breeks Says:

    i don’t like, nor get or, rather, get nor like, only fools and horses. i did see one of the trotter-style 3-wheeled cars pass me by, in Real Life, whilst walking through putney common on saturday.

    they’re like covered wheelbarrows.

    morning all.

  5. indy Says:

    sh: i just posed it.

  6. Swineshead Says:

    I know you did, Indy. That’s why I said ‘Indy posed it’…

    Bree – Only Fools is an institution and, like all institutions, it started gloriously before fading into a bit of a mess.

  7. Nick of the T Says:

    I remember the original Casualty that had a cast of 5.

    Morning all.

    I like home, that’s why I live here.

  8. Mel Says:

    Then why oh why do we need another spin off? Has John Sullivan not made enough money out of this particular pony? I believe that Nappers did a very good illustration of a dead horse being flogged, that we should probably post to Mr Sullivan as a present.

  9. Nick of the T Says:

    Marcus Brigstock is good on TWS this morn. The rest of them are twats.

  10. Swineshead Says:

    ‘why oh why’ is what people say on Points of View – which I notice has dispensed with Terence ‘the bulge’ Wogan’s services. Sadly.

  11. Mel Says:

    and on comment is free and the BBC have yur say. I am feeling particularly daily mail today, having been drinking in parks for too long at the weekend.

    I have no opinion on Terence “the bulge” wogan. Who is doing it now then?

    Nick T – what does TWS stand for please?

  12. Mel Says:

    Nick, i think i have remembered, so plese ignore my last question.

  13. Napoleon Says:

    Jesus. What’s Sullivan’s game, eh? This sounds worse than Roger Roger.

  14. Mel Says:

    NC – i very vaguely remember that – was it with trigger in a taxi firm or something? I never watched it cos the ads looked so bad. Unfortunately, i had not seen ads for the Green Grass, and watched a bit of it by mistake. Ugh.

  15. Napoleon Says:

    It wasn’t anything to do with Only Fools, Mel. Unlike Jimmy Perry, Jeremy Lloyd and David Croft, Sullivan can’t write for shit unless it’s about Derek Trotter.

  16. Swineshead Says:

    Trigger as head of a taxi rank?
    You’re thinking of Darren is Eastenders.

  17. Swineshead Says:

    Trigger as head of a taxi rank?
    You’re thinking of Darren in Eastenders.

  18. Swineshead Says:

    What he said.

  19. Mel Says:

    No, i didn’t think it was only fools, but did star the guy that played trigger who i am too lazy to look up the name of. Or am i just imagining this as well today?

    My head feels like i have been on an old style absinthe bender.

  20. Excelsior! Says:

    Morning all

    Nappers – Good to see you back to full fettle, or typing on the internet anyway.

    I think this prequal is exactly what the world needs.

  21. Napoleon Says:

    I can’t remember if Trigger was in it or not, to be honest. If he was, he didn’t make it any better.

    Bring back ‘There’s No Place Like Home’, I say. I liked it when he went down to his shed to get drunk with him next door with the moustache. And him off of ‘Waiting For God’ was in it as a traffic warden.

  22. Mel Says:

    I think that the world needs more effective painkillers excelsior, but each to their own.

  23. Napoleon Says:

    Mel – I reckon, after seeing the Sex Education vs. Pornography show, that what the world needs is tit surgery free on the NHS.

  24. Excelsior! Says:

    Is this a self inflicted woe Mel?

    If so, i always found a combination of heinz tomato soup and coke (a cola)
    does wonders. Not mixed together though. That wouldnt be nice.

  25. Mel Says:

    Not all the world nappers. Johnny vegas, for example, has a fine pair without surgery.

  26. Mel Says:

    Yes excelsior – self inflicted. Thanks for the hangover tips, but tomato soup and cola – bleurgh.

  27. Excelsior! Says:

    Speaking of tit surgery

    http://www.timesonline.co.uk/tol/news/uk/health/article5993187.ece

    Its good to see science has got a handle on the real issues that plague society.

  28. Napoleon Says:

    Yes, but he’s a slobbering drunkard, Mel. I’m thinking of them poor unfortunate women on that show who had dugs like spaniels’ ears. I know it’s not all about tits when it comes to the fairer sex, but when it comes to the fairer sex, it’s all about tits.

  29. Napoleon Says:

    Stem cells to grow bigger tits? Well I reckon that’s much more worth the research money than finding a cure for malaria. Good on these egg-heads, says I.

  30. indy Says:

    mel: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=j7r7L4eTXAI&feature=PlayList&p=0F6A70143E8201E8&playnext=1&playnext_from=PL&index=49

  31. Mel Says:

    Nice to learn that you are not an arse man, nappers

  32. indy Says:

    np: when it comes to the unfairer sex i wish to put in a word for simon cowell. or simon cowell’s more accurately.

  33. Mel Says:

    Thanks Indy, but You tube does not work for some reason. Can i have a precis?

  34. Napoleon Says:

    Some woman on Trisha’s just said she’d still give her children a cuddle if they burnt down her house. Parents really have gone soft on their kids nowadays, haven’t they? If I’d done that to my mother’s house, I’d now be typing this from my coffin.

  35. indy Says:

    mel: i tried to trick you in to one of your “have nevers”. it’s the back to the future family guy spoof where brian sings “never gonna give you up” (you wrote that you’d never had been rickrolled)

  36. Mel Says:

    ah, well it was a cunning plan, indy.

  37. Swineshead Says:

    It’d be worse for me Napoleon, I’d be typing this from my coffin using mutilated fingers with a slapped wrist at one end of them.

  38. Napoleon Says:

    I’m not even sure she’d have left me with fingers, now you mention it. I’d certainly have had very little skin left on my arse.

  39. Mel Says:

    So what sort of thing do you think the child in question would have to do to the mother in order not to get a cuddle?

  40. Swineshead Says:

    My mother used psychological punishment more often than not. She’d put flour all over the worktop in the kitchen once so she could roll pastry. She warned me not to dip my finger in it and when she turned round and saw fingerprints in it told me in all seriousness that eating flour made children of my age grow an extra nose. I believed her and wept for many hours.

    I WAS 23 YEARS OLD H AH HA HAAAHAH AHa a

  41. Mel Says:

    Mothers eh? sounds like the sort of stuff my mum would do. It is no wonder that i grew up to be such a cynical old crone.

  42. Clarry Says:

    Yeah, well my mum did worse…

    When I was little my mum never allowed me to see her without make up on and hair done. When I enquired as to why this was so, she told me that really she was a pig. An ACTUAL pig. With a tail. And I believed her. I was mortified.

    I was really gullible.

  43. myopiniononstuff Says:

    My dad invented a nightmarish Jimmy Green Teeth meets Freddy Kruger character called ‘Mr Bojangles’ and used to walk into my room with a ketchup drenched knife, screaming ‘Mr Bojangles is coming to kill you”.

    The thought of a child recoiling at the mention of a tap dancer must have amused him.

  44. myopiniononstuff Says:

    I’m aware it should be Jenn Greenteeth but people in Warrington went for Jimmy.

  45. Napoleon Says:

    I once told a friend’s five year old daughter that if she didn’t eat all her dinner, worms would grow out of her head. I also told her if she was naughty at Christmas, instead of Santa Claus, Dog the Bounty Hunter woukld come down the chimney, snatched her away from her mother, and put her in prison in Hawaii with a load of natives strung out on ice. On both occasions she was terrified.

  46. Mel Says:

    Oh Clarry, my mum was more like the dad out of calvin and hobbes. We used to drive to my aunt’s house on a particular road, and there was a church on that road that used to disappear behind a not-too-obvious hill. My mum used to tell me that there was a man whose job it was to wind a cog all day, which in turn wound the church tower up and down.

    I was roughly 6 when i realised this was rubbish, and i never beleived a single word she said after that.

  47. Mel Says:

    I also liked Calvin’s Dad’s assertion that the sun moved across the sky by convection currents.

  48. Napoleon Says:

    Never read Calvin & Hobbes. When I was a kid, I used to read Fred Basset in the Express and whatever the hell it was they had in The Times. They were the only papers we had in the house because my parents were Tories (Nazis).

    I went to the grocer’s this weekend, and saw these signs:

    Strawberry’s
    Lemon’s
    Baker’s (spuds)
    Mushroom’s
    Turnip’s

    The ignorant fucking pig’s.

  49. Excelsior! Says:

    I like that one Mel, it assumes that a child has a working knowledge of fluid dynamics. Sticking on against dumbing down in child foolery.

  50. Clarry Says:

    I must have been the dream gullible kid for the amusement of bored parents and the big kids…

    My mum also used to ignore me if I did a bad thing. Believe me, that is worse than a good hiding. I used to dream of smacked bums, instead of the dreaded silent treatment. If I was really naughty the ignoring could go on for days. She would continue to feed me and wash and iron my clothes etc., but remain completely silent. I distinctly remember slipping a note under the sitting room door once, trying to persuade her that I was good now. Now THAT was psychological punishment SH.

  51. Excelsior! Says:

    Jesus Clarry, that’s cold that is.

    I expect it’ll all come out in therepy after the inevitable brakedown.

  52. Napoleon Says:

    Clarry – Smacked arses were worse. You should count y’self lucky you got the silent treatment. That, effectively, means nothing happened to you at all. A monkey could have put up with that sort of punishment. A MONKEY.

  53. Swineshead Says:

    Silent treatment means you get to go to the pub or round your mates house scot free when you’re an adult. As such, you were treated lightly.

    Napoleon, do you realise your weekly bastard was briefly mentioned in The Guardian? We were recommended (in the actual paper) as a decent Apprentice blog and it said ‘plus bonus Trevor Jordache’.

  54. Napoleon Says:

    In the actual paper? Good bit of advertising there, eh?

  55. Mel Says:

    And Andrew collins has sent people this way for apprentice related stuff, as it seems he is too cynical and jaded about economics to bother watching it anymore.

  56. Clarry Says:

    E understands Naps – silence is the worst.

    ‘I’m really sorry for breaking that ornament mummy’

    Silence

    ‘Forgive me?’

    Silence + tumbleweeds

    ‘I love you mummy’

    Silence + gushing winds

    *weeps*

    SILENCE + icicles + sharp frost

    *gently rocks self to sleep*

    _____________

    *wins*

    *Does lap of honour*

  57. Excelsior! Says:

    A monkey probably wouldn’t realise what was happening, and would happily continue throwing jiz and excrement at the walls, oblivious to the fact that any sort of punishment was going on at all.

    Clarry i now have a horrible mental picture of you as that child off the NSPCC adverts thats quietly wimpering for his mum.

  58. Napoleon Says:

    Clarry – Rubbish. You should have grown y’self a damn backbone, my girl. ‘Mummy’, indeed. I’ve never called my mother ‘mummy’ at any stage in my life ever. Grow up, that’s my advice. She should have belted you balck and blue – knocked some sense into you.

    *laughs at the idea of silence as punishment*
    *then wins*

  59. Napoleon Says:

    That’s right – balck. What of it? Eh?

    *adopts bullish stance*

  60. myopiniononstuff Says:

    Is it okay to like The Division Bell era Floyd or not?

  61. Clarry Says:

    Most humans with feelings would find that to be an excruciating punishment NC, one that lingers far longer than any smacked bum. Something which i’d imagine you’d have protected yourself against with an extra pair of pants or summat, and you’d go bounding off shouting something like ‘Didn’t hurt!!!’ over your shoulder.

    I do agree that it is a puny punishment in adult life though.

  62. Clarry Says:

    MOOS – NO

  63. Napoleon Says:

    Clarry – There’s nothing excrutiating about that punishment at all. It’s just not being talked to. That’s nothing. NOTHING. Try your father coming through the door and laying into your arse with his belt buckle until the skin’s hanging off and see how hard not being talked to sounds. You kids today think you’d had it hard. Have you buggery, you bunch of mollycoddled little wets. Get y’self a spine, you spilt milk crier-over.

    OUTRAGEOUS!

    Dave – S’alright.

  64. myopiniononstuff Says:

    Coming Back to Life sounds okay. Not a patch on their other two line-ups though, I’ve decided.

    I won’t question it ever again.

  65. Clarry Says:

    What you describe NC is bordering on child abuse – i’m comparing ordinary, run-of-the-mill smacked bums with being ignored by your mother, the giver of mum hugs and love.

  66. ugeine Says:

    My mum never needed to slap me. You should have heard her voice. Like a foghorn getting raped.

  67. Napoleon Says:

    Child abuse? Balls! Comeuppance for breaking into and flooding a crown green bowling green and ruining a tournament several villages were supposed to be participating in that weekend, more like. Child abuse, my arse.

    I’ve just had a gander at Collins’s blog, and note the buggers have cancelled Not Going Out and he’s called us ‘diplomacy-free’. Not happy about the first bit, like the second bit. We should use that as a quote.

  68. Clarry Says:

    What, so your father “laying into your arse with his belt buckle until the skin’s hanging off” is normal is it? If so, that’s dreadful. I still maintain that ‘normal’ punishment in the form of a smacked bum (delivered by hand) is not as mentally scarring as the silent treatment.

    Shall we agree to disagree?

  69. Napoleon Says:

    Getting leathered for being a little bastard used to be normal, yes. Once that stopped, kids became precious little worms who remain childish, mollycoddled crybabies long into their teens. Beat the little buggers, I say, beat ’em until they learn some ‘arsh lessons about the world.

    If you have kids, you should beat them. BEAT THEM.

  70. Nick of the T Says:

    I was too busy up chimneys to get beaten.

  71. Napoleon Says:

    Even that’s a cop-out. In the good old days (Victorian Britain), kids were sent up chimneys and beaten when they got home. What did we have then? Only half the fucking world enslaved, that’s what! What do we have now? NOTHING.

    I rest my case, and win.

  72. Clarry Says:

    Saw an excerpt from a school punishment log the other day and it read something along the lines of ‘Perkins given 3 lashes for being plain lazy and stupid’.

  73. Napoleon Says:

    Quite bloody right too. I was reading a local paper where a teacher’s been charged with assault for slapping a kid across the face. If I’d bothered to inform my mother that Mr. Jessop had slapped me into a wall when he did just that back in 1989, she wouldn’t have gone to the police and had him charged with assault, she’d have slapped me into a wall as well, and then rang the man to thank him for knocking some sense into me. That bastard.

  74. Excelsior! Says:

    Napoleon – i think ive read a serialized acount of your life – Biffa Bacon wasn’t it?

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